Egotistically Superior

Oscar Post

2008-02-27T18:02:00.003-05:00

I've been slack and I wanted to do an Oscar post. So, here it is, with a few extras:

Pic: This ladies and gentlemen is the exquisite Marion Cotillard. My good friend Doyle has some great stuff about the Best/Worst dressed on Oscar night, but he got it all wrong on this one. No one will ever convince me that this dress, on her, is anything less than angelic. I want her so bad, oh baby, oh baby. And according to Yahoo, only 9% of players picked her to win. Even more points for me for having some serious foresight!

Article: This is Daniel Day-Lewis's back stage interview and includes such tasty gems as "none of your f--king business" and "I feel like a sandwich." Just totally classic stuff. "I drink your milkshake! I drink it up!" I love it! "I told you I was gonna eat you!" How do you turn those two lines into cinematic genius!? That script was something else...some kind of beast and that man is a pure effing genius.

WTF: Saturday Night Live owns the ultimate Oscar Parody. It is sooooooo funny!!! Scope it!

EXTRA SPECIAL POST! Acceptance speech from the Once kids. Oh so good...

Glen Hansard:
Thanks! This is amazing. What are we doing here? This is mad. We made this film two years ago. We shot on two Handycams. It took us three weeks to make. We made it for a hundred grand. We never thought we would come into a room like this and be in front of you people. It's been an amazing thing. Thanks for taking this film seriously, all of you. It means a lot to us. Thanks to the Academy, thanks to all the people who've helped us, they know who they are, we don't need to say them. This is amazing. Make art. Make art. Thanks.

Marketa Irglova:
Hi everyone. I just want to thank you so much. This is such a big deal, not only for us, but for all other independent musicians and artists that spend most of their time struggling, and this, the fact that we're standing here tonight, the fact that we're able to hold this, it's just to prove no matter how far out your dreams are, it's possible. And, you know, fair play to those who dare to dream and don't give up. And this song was written from a perspective of hope, and hope at the end of the day connects us all, no matter how different we are. And so thank you so much, who helped us along way. Thank you.

Chess

2008-02-23T13:12:00.003-05:00

It's Saturday morning and I am engaged in, quite certainly, the coolest internet activity in which I've ever engaged. I am playing chess with my friend in Taiwan via Facebook. It is super awesome. I cannot believe that I am able to have this kind of interaction with someone, literally, on the opposite side of the world. Ever since I began playing chess on the Facebook, this simple notion of connecting across the globe has been picking at my brain. I used to play World of Warcraft, and this notion never once gave me pause. Perhaps it's the contrast between the millenia old game of chess and the very historically nascent internet.

I want to play you in a game of Facebook chess. So, all of you must, at once, go to Facebook, install the application, "Chess," and issue me a challenge.

Now, links:

A Picture: Okay, sorry to fib...again. It's really a collection of quotes with their appropriate speaker's picture. Can I just say that I L-O-V-E Henry David Thoreau's beard?!?! OMG! Not only a revolutionary in terms of self-reliance and civil disobedience, but a regular facial fuzz forerunner. I want that beard soooo bad.

An Article: Wow! That is wicked awesome! But oh noes! There's pollution! They're chlorinating the single largest source of fresh water on the planet! It's not even like straight pool chlorine, no way, this is paper mill waste. Gross! That stuff stinks! And then old Vladi P. did some good work for the Earth. Score one for Vladi P.

WTF: Now I am absolutely certain that there is lots of stuff that pisses off lots of people, but someone actually created a list for this group. They've got links to hundreds of articles which outline the ire and disdain of Islam towards a particular cultural item. This list is long, crazy, and includes they're feelings towards Apple Computers, the Dalai Llama, even freakin' hair gel. Oh man. I'd love to see a list of what pisses off Buddhists. You think they have one? I bet it's all existential...Contest: name the best (or worst) thing on the list of everything Buddhists hate and win props on the Ego. My entry: Buddhists cannot abide the list of things they cannot abide.

Fin.

For Real's This Time

2008-02-22T17:13:00.003-05:00

More web fun from everybody's favorite Italian. Oscars are coming, are you ready? I know I am. 'Tis a secret for know...but here's a hint. Atonement.

Let's get right to it shall we:

First) I saw so many great pictures today! How can I post just one? What shall I do? Can't decide which pic is bes--Owl! Oh snap! Where did that Owl come from?! I was totally typing and bam! You see that?He was all like, get up on out my grill, dog. Intrusive owl. So, anyway, back to the pic of the day. Man, Chris Jordan Rocks! Kinda puts a whole new perspective on the way we live. Real good stuff, to me. Eerie, creepy, sad and only because it's true. Those are facts, y'know? Numbers. Stats. Can't argue with those things. They just are. Shame...

Deux) I absolutely loathe the RIAA with all the loathing in the world! They are such huge jerks! I wish I could punch them all in the face. Just line them up and and superman-it right down the line: pow, bam, smash, ouch. Like Superman action with Batman subtitles. That would be the coolest ever. However, I can't do that today because all I have is this stupid video which tries to make legislatures believe that somehow burning a CD is just like selling crack cocaine. OMG I hate the RIAA. Can't they just go away? You know they've won exactly ONE law suit. They've settled all the others. Such jerks....

Lastly) That last one was gonna be the WTF until I found this WTF which is by far more wtf-ish. I should come up with something like this: send me $100 and I'll let my buddy shove me in the lake with all my clothes on while filming it, then I'll post it on youTube and say it was all your fault! It's like you pay me to shove me into a lake only you don't do the shoving so you're hands are clean and you can sleep easy knowing that you've been morally absolved due to the wonders of capitalism. Thanks Capitalism!

Be back tomorrow! (hopefully...what if there is no tomorrow?)

Just Pretend it's Yesterday

2008-02-22T06:14:00.003-05:00

So, for one reason or another I didn't have enough time yesterday to do my super-awesome Best of teh Intrawebs. So, just act like it's Thursday and all these goodies will be like new. I'll post tonight as well. Since it's Friday, I can stay up past my bedtime.

1) Pic: Again, not so much a single picture. This is actually a great resource. I've bookmarked this page and used it several times. You should, too. It's a Chinese Character Dictionary and uses many different dialects. So, before you get that wicked sweet tattoo, you may want to confirm what the guy at the parlor says. Just because he thinks it means "Strength," doesn't mean he's not an idiot nor a prankster and you may be about to get stuck with "he who has small penis" on his arm for the rest of your life. That's wisdom, baby.

B) This article, I feel, says a lot about our relations with China. I'm not a China hater and I really wish they would get their act together on product and food safety. But, let's be real for a second. We're asking the Chinese to do in something like 10-15 years what took over a hundred years for America to do. I mean, the FDA is a rather new bureaucracy compared to our over 200 year old country. I'm not surprised Olympiads are doing this, though. I certainly would and I most certainly support it.

III) WTF?! They did this in 1973!! Oh, this gets my dander up (this gets up my dander?)! I just can't believe that we've got our panties in a twist these days about gas mpg, carbon emissions, global warming etc. and this kind of technology has been available for 35 years. Just quite bitter. It's not even like what they did was very advanced or even convenient, stylish or marketable. But, I mean, come on. After 35 years of playing with this idea you'd figure someone would do it better. I mean how hard is it to, instead of 376 mpg get half that? A quarter of that?!?! OMG. So pissed off...wtf.

I hope the internets were kind to you, too.

Teh best of teh Intrawebs

2008-02-20T18:07:00.004-05:00

So, I spend a lot of time on the internets and I wanted to share with all you lovely people the best of the web I see everyday. We'll see how long this lasts. But my goal is seven straight days. So, keep checking this week, and maybe I'll make it through.

I'm struggling. Do I do just one link? I have at least five...maybe I could do like one picture and one article and one "wtf." We'll try that today:

Pic: I didn't see a decent stand-alone pic, but I did see this article with great pics. I don't know how I feel about the tone of that article. It seems patronizing of one of the oldest civilizations on the planet. Still, I'd love to see an Armani/Surma walk-off.

Article: Total eclipse of the moon tonight! I'm excited! Are you? Eclipses always make me feel weird. I love it. I'll be out there tonight contemplating my life, the universe and our place in it.

WTF: Today's WTF won't hurt anyone's feelings. It's actually kinda cool. Play. (the sites down right now, but it should be back up by the time you read this...for the meantime)

Tomorrow, there shall be more of Teh best of teh Intrawebs!

P.S. http://thehayworth.blogspot.com is always sooooo funny!

Creativity

2007-11-13T12:25:00.000-05:00

So, working with Ms. Cameron (see previous post) has led me to not only create more, but to feel better about that which I do create. Talk about liberation. Or talk about fulfillment. Or, if you dare, talk about strudel.

Point:

I don't often update this blog, for reasons which I am unawares...regardless, a creative outpouring of mine will often manifest itself over on The Hayworth's 'blog: The Propaganda Pipeline (http://thehayworth.blogspot.com). Blogger is being retarded right now and not letting me create posts with the fancy interface, thus, no linkage.

I have recently posted on his troubles with MRSA, a medically resistant form of the staph bacteria. It's a three part series that has brought great joy to my life. Indeed, the Empire is a glorious creation for which I often receive awkward glances. Some people have a terribly difficult time wrapping their heads around the fact that I help run an intergalactic empire. I don't know why.

Either way, here are links to the three part series:

Part One:
http://thehayworth.blogspot.com/2007/10/special-report.html

Part Two:
http://thehayworth.blogspot.com/2007/11/attention-loyal-cohorts-of-realm-this.html

Part Three:
http://thehayworth.blogspot.com/2007/11/cured.html

Enjoy!

Ok. So, Yea and Stuff

2007-11-08T10:57:00.001-05:00

Hola, Interwebs. This is an update about me. I would update you on other matters, however I have to live up to the title of this 'blog.

The past few months have been interesting, exciting, terrifying, liberating, joyful, and many other, mostly positive, adjectives.

I've been in the theatre non-stop since July 1. Well, I took two weeks off there in August, but otherwise, it's been go, go, go. I'm closing up a run of Euripides's' "Trojan Women" at Meredith College right now. My sentiments surrounding the show are mixed, indeed. If you've seen the show, or if not, grab a hold of me offline for interesting conversation.

I have a new girlfriend. Too soon, you ask? No, I respond. Just right. I've recently been accused of being a serial monogamist. Well, not accused, but inquired as to whether I was or not. So, adopting the title was a choice I made. I am. I like it. New GF is named Melissa (aka Melly Mel) and she's pretty awesome. She's not perfect. None are nor ever will be. However, I take great joy in all of who she is and hopes to be, even if all those things scare me a bit. She's an actress/dancer, in that order, and this leads us to find rather creative means of spending time together and also to exchanging intelligent conversation over tea and quinoa. She's a crafty one, too. I don't mean she does crafts. I mean she's sneaky and sly, but not in a deceptive way. She has her wits well about her and helps me find perspective - often different ones at that. And she's absolutely gorgeous, but I'm sure you knew that.

I have a roommate these days, as well. The Emperor has taken up shop on my living room floor. I'm always glad to help a friend in need and his company has yet to be in any way a nuisance. We've actually decided to found Empire HQ just down the road a bit in a two-bedroom apartment. We'll let you know when HQ is up and running for public tours.

Autumn is here. She flew in late and sudden and I've been rather chilly ever since - especially my toes. Circulation issues, perhaps...I'm endeavoring to leave the heat off this Winter, however I worry that the apt. may be too poorly insulated for such lofty goals. Also, the sun is hidden by trees, even though I have two eastward facing windows, so She offers little heat during the day.

If you've not read The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron, you're doing yourself a great disservice. This book is changing my life. I'm reading it after recently finishing another life altering book entitled The Intent to Live by Larry Moss. If you are an actor reading this 'blog, you owe it to yourself to buy, read, and study Mr. Moss's lessons.

Plans have been made and steps have been taken to take the plunge into the great unknown that is New York City. Mixed emotions about this as well. I'm not there yet, but I long to be. There is a great passion within me for this thing I do called acting and the artist within me is screaming at me many things - mostly dreams. I suppose there are two choices here: listen or ignore. Today, I choose to listen, give in to passion, and dare to follow dreams.

Heard on NPR: In life we have to make terrifying choices or else we will die a slow death.

I'm too young to start dying.

Sinister

2007-08-13T18:08:00.000-05:00

Today is Left-Hander's Day. It feels good to be on top for a day. 364 days a year it is Right-Hander's Day, but today, all of you are second-rate citizens. Just like us lefties...364 days a year. Do you know how many accidents happen a year because tools are made with Right-Handed users in mind? Lots! Just the other day they discovered that the same gene that makes you left-handed, makes you schizophrenic. How's that for oppression? Genetically oppressed by stupid Nature and stupid science. There are all kinds of references, specifically Biblical, that displays, in no uncertain terms, that being to the left of anyone is about the most evilest place you could be. The right side however...But I understand your reasons for all the oppression. Honestly. You were just scared that while shaking our hands, we'd stab you. That's a legitimate concern.

The day is ours!

Smoothius Updaticus

2007-08-09T08:00:00.000-05:00

Hello all! Long time no update. Me so sorry. Me so busy! During the past month I have been working on a production of Wait Until Dark with Hot Summer Nights at the Kennedy here in Raleigh. It was swell fun; a very intense rehearsal process consisting of 16 rehearsals, seven days a week until opening. I kinda enjoyed it. I think I wouldn’t mind more quick rehearsal processes as long as there was time for some solid direction. The show went great, people loved it and I got paid, son. All well and good. I begin rehearsals for Elizabeth: Almost by Chance a Woman by Dario Fo here in about 10 days and that will be quite fun. I have heard some wonderful things about the director and The Hayworth will be in management which is also very cool. This play has compelled me to start working out. You’ll have to attend to find out why. Unless, of course, you already know. In which case, you shouldn’t spoil it for everyone else.

I’m going to see the Allman Brother’s Band in concert this weekend with my step-father and I am extremely excited. Concert starts at five, so there will be many hours of blues to be enjoyed.

Gretchen was in town recently and we had swell fun. First there was an ARG reunion at Carraba’s in Apex, and then her, Greg (recently returned to us form the Appalachian Trail), and Luke came and enjoyed some of Ryan’s Risotto and wine. Quite tasty.

My sister and my mother came up just about a week ago to hang out and see the show. We randomly went to Chapel Hill to check out the Aveda Institute there. My sister had been planning on attending the Aveda Institute in Charlotte, however, plans change sometimes and now my sister may be going to school in Chapel Hill. Uh oh, two Nazionale’s in the Triangle. This is trouble.

While they were here, Jazz started bleeding everywhere. That was an adventure. She’s fine and hasn’t been to the vet because that would be too expensive. But, she’s fine.

I got the new White Stripes and it’s amazing. Why aren’t you listening to it right now?

Have you seen The Fountain yet? No, go watch it. Now. Right right now. You’ll thank me.

In my plight to consume 3500 calories a day, I start my day with this tasty smoothie. On Sundays I make enough to last the entire week. You should, too. Recipe:

Ryan’s Breakfast Smoothie:

1 cup Organic, Non-fat, Plain Yogurt
1/3 cup Flaxseed
1 cup Granola
3 oz Blueberries
8 oz Strawberries
2 large Bananas

In blender, add, in order, yogurt, flaxseed, granola. Set blender on high (mine says “liquefy”) and blend well. Add Blueberries, Strawberries, and bananas and blend well (this step may require using a tool such as a spoon or knife to encourage the fruit to blend). Makes about 4 cups.

Nutritional Information (taken from www.caloriecount.com )

Serving Size: 1 cup
Calories: 450
Fat: 16g
Carbs: 66g
Protein: 16g
Sodium: 81mg
Fiber: 14g

If you want to super-charge it, add a scoop or two of Whey protein to significantly increase calories and protein (to about 500 and 25 respectively). For variety, switch out fruit with raspberries, blackberries, currants, pineapple, mango, kiwi etc. and try different kinds of granola from the bulk food section of your grocery store. IMPORTANT NOTE: this may take som getting use to - a period of adjustment per se - 14g of fiber is 6g shy of your daily recommended allowance and it will probably take about a week for your body to be able to handle that. You've been warned.

Enjoy!

Icky Thump

2007-07-05T18:17:00.000-05:00

In case you didn't know....

The White Stripes effing rock my socks!!!!!

The Fountain

2007-06-30T18:33:00.000-05:00

What a day.

Early morning helping some friends move into a much larger apartment. That was some back-breakin' work, but it felt good.

I came home, had beer, and watched The Fountain. Have you seen this? Why not? Run, do not walk, to the nearest distributor of movies and rent it. If you're feeling rather whippy, buy it. You won't regret it. It's Sci-Fi, but don't let that scare you. It's beautiful. Hugh Jackman is amazing. This movie is an emotional ride about love, life and death.

Get this:

"No matter how good CGI looks at first, it dates quickly," [Darren Aronofsky] says. "But 2001 really holds up. So I set the ridiculous goal of making a film that would reinvent space without using CGI."

Of the five movies nominated for Best Picture last year, I have seen all of them save The Queen. This movie is better than all of them. It was totally snobbed by the Academy. Brad Pitt made his Troy and it was absolute trash and that proves he's a moron. This movie probably just broke into my top five all time.

Why aren't you watching this movie right now?

Be Like the Squirrel

2007-06-25T18:14:00.000-05:00

Hello ladies and gentleman and thank you for joining us today at Ye Olde Ego. That is, to say, if this blog was an establishment for the procurement of alcoholic beverages and spirits, it would most certainly have a large wooden sign outside, not unlike a wagon wheel, stating the name of said establishment boldly as, "Ye Olde Timey Ego." However, this is a blog, not an establishment, which is good because all of the coolest blogs are anti-establishment. Duh.

*****WARNING*****

NON-SEQUITOR APPROACHING!

Do you like cheese? I do. I avoid milk, and often cheese as well. However, no one's hear and I have some colby jack cheese and some Fire Roasted Tomato and Olive Oil Triscuits. Do I dare? Do I? Indeed, I dare. Indeed.

I wanted to post a video in this post to make it more "multi-media-ed," if you will. Here's a video that Egm and Sean Cross showed me on their recent visit to Raleigh.

They came and showed me their baby and put it my lap and I was afraid I might break it. But she is beautiful to behold. See how did that with the looking and the holding in the same sentence? We had tea and went out for sushi. I had a fantastic time.

I signed up for Facebook this week. It's kind weird, I know, but you'll adjust. It's called social networking and it's how people communicate in the 21st Century. By no means am I encouraging you to open a Facebook account. However, in the event that you do, you may end up being my friend -- as if you weren't my friend now (you can even have varying degrees of friendliness with others on this Facebook). After becoming my friend (again, officially(?)) you may look at my profile page and you might even read it. If you did that, then you will more than likely, at some point, read, "Relationship Status: Single." It's true.

There's that then.

I saw Million Dollar Baby and it was a good movie. It wasn't great, Hillary Swank was nothing spectacular. Greg said that the movie set you up, I think I kinda disagree, particularly because he's not here to defend himself. Clint Eastwood was great but that was a given. Good story. Good script. Best Director? Good Director. I don't know. A worthy film to watch.

In closing:

Take all your problems and rip 'em apart
O, o, a-oh, o
Carry them off in a shopping cart
O, o, a-oh, o

Another thing you should've known from the start
O, o, a-oh, o
The problems in hand are lighter than at heart
O, o, a-oh, o

Be like the squirrel, girl be like the squirrel
O, o, a-oh, o
Give it a whirl, girl be like the squirrel
O, o, a-oh, o
Be like the squirrel, be like the squirrel

--Jack White

Zippety-Do-Bla

2007-06-19T05:15:00.000-05:00

Well, after some serious hassling and cajoling by both the Emperor and The Doyle, I suppose a post is overdue. I was really hoping for some stronger discussion on the prior topic, but that's cool.

Life has been pretty crazy. I just got back from a week's vacation to Columbia, SC to Asheville, back to Columbia then to Uwharrie, NC and finally back to Raleigh. I had a great time on the road. Jazz came along. We went to Uwharrie to spend four days and three nights in the woods of the Uwharrie National Forest. It was pretty awesome. I think Jazz was under the impression that we would be moving to the woods. Now that we're back here in Raleigh, I think she's quite happy to be back with her (my) big bed and familiar smells of home.

I recently watched Letter from Iwo Jima and that was a pretty freakin' good movie. Best Picture Nominee for a reason: Clint Eastwood is an effing genius. So, I'm watching this movie right, and they're all making battle plans to defend the island against the United States, right, and there's this point in the movie, after they talk about some of these characters lives and histories, and I said to myself, not audibly, "Man, I hope they can pull this off. What?! Wait! I'm on America's team!" That was the moment I realized I was watching a true work of art. A very well made film, go see it.

I start work with Hot Summer Nights at the Kennedy on July 9th for a seriously intense two week rehearsal. We don't actually get into the actual space until about two days before tech, either. I have got to start learning my lines...

Sean and Egm and Hazel-nuts are here in the capitol, I need to call them.

Well, there it is, a brief and, hopefully, poignant update on my status in life. Was it good for you?

C. S. Lewis, What Have You Done?

2007-04-28T14:53:00.000-05:00

So, C. S. Lewis is a total pimp, right? I mean, I don't think anyone who reads this will argue that Lewis was an absolutely amazing writer, dreamer, theologist and philosopher. I've read much of his work, some of it more than once. I feel confident that you most likely have, too. So, check out this little excerpt taken from the end of The Last Battle:

"Know, O warlike kings," said Emeth, " and you, O ladies whose beauty illuminates the universe, that I am Emeth, the seventh son of Harpa Tarkaan of the city of Tehishbaan, Westward beyond the desert. I came lately into Narnia with nine and twenty others under the command of Rishda Tarkaan. Now when I first heard that we should march upon Narnia I rejoiced; for I had heard many things of your Land and desired greatly to meet you in battle. But when I found that we were to go in disguised as merchants (which is a shameful dress for a warrior and the son of a Tarkaan) and to work by lies and trickery, then my joy departed from me. And most of all when I found we must wait upon a Monkey and when it began to be said that Tash and Aslan were one, then the world became dark in my eyes. For always since I was a boy I have served Tash and my great desire was to know more of him, if it might be, to look upon his face. But the name of Aslan was hateful to me.

"And, as you have seen, we were called together outside the straw-roofed hovel, night after night, and the fire was kindled, and the Ape brought forth out of the hovel something upon four legs that I could not well see. And the people and the Beasts bowed down and did honor to it. But I thought, the Tarkaan is deceived by the Ape: for this thing that comes out of the stable is neither Tash nor any other god. But when I watched the Tarkaan's face, and marked every word that he said to the Monkey, then I changed my mind: for I saw that the Tarkaan did not believe in it himself. And then I understood that he did not believe in Tash at all: for if he had, how could he dare to mock him?

"When I understood this, a great rage fell upon me and I wondered that the true Tash did not strike down both the Monkey and the Tarkaan with fire from heaven. Nevertheless I hid my anger and held my tongue and waited to see how it would end. But last night, as some of you know, the Monkey brought not forth the yellow thing but said that all who desired to look upon Tashlan -- for so they mixed the two words to pretend that they were all one -- must pass one by one into the hovel. And I said to myself, Doubtless this is some other deception. But when the Cat had followed in and had come out again in a madness of terror, then I said to myself, Surely the true Tash, whom they called on without knowledge or belief, has now come among us, and will avenge himself. And though my heart was turned into water inside me because of the greatness and terror of Tash, yet my desire was stronger than my fear, and I put force upon my knees to stay them from trembling, and on my teeth that they should not chatter, and resolved to look upon the face of Tash though he should slay me. So I offered myself to go into the hovel; and the Tarkaan, though unwillingly, let me go.

"As soon as I had gone in at the door, the first wonder was that I found myself in this great sunlight (as we all are now) though the inside of the hovel had looked dark from outside. But I had no time to marvel at this, for immediately I was forced to fight for my head against one of our own men. As soon as I saw him I understood that the Monkey and the Tarkaan had set him there to slay any who came in if he were not in their secrets: so that this man also was a liar and a mocker and no true servant of Tash. I had the better will to fight him; and having slain the villain, I cast him out behind me through the door.

"Then I looked about me and saw the sky and the wide lands and smelled the sweetness. And I said, By the Gods, this is a pleasant place: it may be that I am come into the country of Tash. And I began to journey into the strange country and to seek him.

"So I went over much grass and many flowers and among all kinds of wholesome and delectable trees till lo! in a narrow place between two rocks there came to meet me a great Lion. The speed of him was like the ostrich, and his size was an elephant's; his hair was like pure gold and the brightness of his eyes like gold that is liquid in the furnace. He was more terrible than the flaming furnace. He was more terrible than the Flaming Mountain of Lagour, and in beauty he surpassed all that is in the world even as the rose in bloom surpasses the dust of the desert. Then I fell at his feet and thought, Surely this is the hour of death, for the Lion (who is worthy of all honor) will know that I have served Tash all my days and not him. Nevertheless, it is better to see the Lion and die that to be Tisroc of the world and live and not to have seen him. But the Glorious One bent down his golden head and touched my forehead with his tongue and said, Son, thou art welcome. But I said, Alas, Lord, I am no son of thine but the servant of Tash. He answered, Child, all the service thou hast done to Tash, I account as service done to me. Then by reasons of my great desire for wisdom and understanding, I overcame my fear and questioned the Glorious One and said, Lord, is it true, as the Ape said, that thou and Tash are one? The Lion growled so that the earth shook (but his wrath was not against me) and said, It is false. Not because he and I are one, but because we are opposites, I take to me the services which thou hast done to him. For I and he are of such different kinds that no service which is vile can be done to me, and none which is not vile can be done to him. Therefore if any man swear by Tash and keep his oath for the oath's sake, it is by me that he has truly sworn, though he know it not, and it is I who reward him. And if any man do a cruelty in my name, then, though he says the name Aslan, it is Tash whom he serves and by Tash his deed is accepted. Dost thou understand, Child? I said, Lord, thou knowest how much I understand. But I said also (for the truth constrained me), Yet I have been seeking Tash all my days. Beloved, said the Glorious One, unless thy desire had been for me thou wouldst not have sought so long and so truly. For all find what they truly seek.

"Then he breathed upon me and took away the trembling from my limbs and caused me to stand upon my feet. And after that, he said not much but that we should meet again, and I must go further up and further in. Then he turned him about in a storm and flurry of gold and was gone suddenly.

"And since then, O kings and Ladies, I have been wandering to find him and my happiness is so great that it even weakens me like a wound. And this is the marvel of marvels, that he called me Beloved, me who am but as a dog --"

I'm gonna number these for discussion referencing.

So, recently I was talking about Gregg, The Rockel and I eating breakfast together and we are discussing some Christian Existentialism over omelets. It was great. One of the things we talked about was what happens to people in remote parts of the world who have no opportunity to hear the Gospel? Do they go to Hell?
A few weeks ago, Gregg and I were discussing how precisely we could describe our personal religious beliefs. One of the problems we had during the conversation was what about people of other religions? Do they get in to heaven?
Then there were questions as to the nature of God's mercy, justice, jealousy, vengeance, wrath and love. For, as I understand, we serve a God of all these things.
Then, Gregg showed me this passage the other night whilst waiting on The Custer to arrive in the Triangle from the University of Florida. Wasn't Tash the Devil in The Chronicles? How much do you think the words of C. S. Lewis apply to other religions like Judaeism, Islam, Buddhism, Zoroastrianism?
If you've read The Great Divorce, Emeth's description of the journey he takes once inside the hovel is in line with Lewis's major portrayal of heaven so we know what he's talking about: going before God and saying I followed someone else and God saying "Meh, you were wrong, it was me the whole time. Yup, in ya go."
Dante won't go this far. He puts the virtuous pagans in Limbo which is described very much like Elysian Fields in which the souls aren't tortured, just grievous. The are saddened by the knowledge of the fact that they must serve eternity so far separated from God with no hope for reconciliation.
Lewis goes WAY past that and says that as long as you believed something "for the oath's sake" then you get a free pass. If this is true, then what's the point of the Gospel, "The only way to the father," and all that business?

Thoughts?

Existential Propaganda

2007-04-23T20:09:00.000-05:00

Buenos Dias me amigos.

What a fantastic weekend it was. Friday I rolled out to the Creek to see Campbell's production of Scapin and it was a lot of fun. I knew many cast members and they all were stellar. After the show, Jason aka "Monkey," Greg, and I rolled over to the Custer's house where we chatted over tea. Monkey did not have tea. He had beer. And a cut above his eye, but that's another story. Zach was at the show, too, with his mom and the Custer's mom. I was high on nostalgia.

Saturday there was a wedding and I looked like a total pimp in all black, except for a few pinstripes.

The tie was courteous of an ever forgetful Rockel. I managed to sneak out of the extremely nice reception to go meet up with friends to commence the carousing. Seriously though, best reception ever. A vegetarian smorgasbord. Apparently the "in" thing right now is mashed potato bars. This is the third wedding I've been to with one. It was actually held at the Exploris Museum and they are doing a Sharks-3d IMAX movie that I really think I'm gonna go see.

After the reception, it was to the Tir Na Nog to meet up with the The Rockel, Greg, The Hayworth and his wife, Noelle. I was complimented on my hat by an authentic Irish person and enjoyed a glass of The Balvenie, one of my favorite scotches. We left there, got lost, and finally found ourselves at The Raleigh Times. That's when things get a little fuzzy. There were reports that the cab driver may have been a bit androgynous and I may have really embarrassed myself.

After waking up with my brain rattling all about my skull, I slammed a cup of tea and loaded up The Rockel and The Turmel into the Ghetto Glider and wheeled us over to The Farmer's Market Restaurant for a healthy, rounded, hangover-curing breakfast with plenty of water, coffee, and carbs. We discussed Christian Existentialism and came to no real conclusions. If you believe in an a priori morality, chew on this.

After wandering through aisles of fresh herbs and munching on free strawberries we parted ways. The Rockel and I rushed over to the house to start the chili before running back out to catch what was to be a free trip to the theatre where we could see a sword fight with a dragon, but when we got there, we were denied entrance from the very person who promised to sneak us in the back. They shall remain anonymous. Instead, we sat in the rose garden and debated other things we could do. Instead just went home, but not before stopping to look at the only rose in the garden.

Then we prepared a feast for the gods!

It was marvelous. Skewers of grouper, shrimp, pineapple, red & orange & green peppers, onions, and mushrooms.

Then grilled with a bit of hickory on the coals.

Let me tell you....MMMH! Ate that! With fresh homemade bread from Greg who brought Tow. Played a silly game called "Compatibility" which ended up being fun and then it was bedtime.

Is it Friday yet? I need a vacation from my weekend...

In case you've been living under a rock. I kind of kidnapped the Propaganda Pipeline.

Volver

2007-04-17T05:46:00.000-05:00

Have you seen this movie? Why not? It's really pretty fantastic.

This is Penelope Cruz. Not only is she a total babe, but she is actually a pretty good actress. She does pretty awesome in this movie, but Oscar nod? I don't know. There was that scene, like there is always "that scene" where you just know that this is the moment that can really set you apart and I just thought it was lacking. If you see/have seen it we can discuss. This movie is totally twisted and morbid, but also funny and heart-warming. Dark comedy? I think so.

The Netflix r0x0r5 my b0x0r5

The Rockel is moving soon and I'm going to be planning a party for it. There will be an e-vite and if you want one, you should let me know. We haven't made a list, yet, will you be on it? There will be beer, grilling, and an all around good time. There will be seafood. There will not be cow, or pork, or poultry, or lamb, or various and sundry other meats because they have feelings and everyone knows that fish don't have feelings.

Easter was a good time, too. I managed to make it back home to Columbia for a weekend and party a bit for some birthday's and also take some family pictures which, believe it or not, came out really good. My family is way hot. I'm not boasting, I'm just saying that, y'know, if you're jealous, I understand. If I wasn't in my family I would be jealous, too.

This weekend marks the opening of Campbell University's newest theatrical production. Scapin which features Luke Custer, Jeff Enoch, and Monkey. You should go. I know I am.

Speaking of theatre, I've been cast in a show for Hot Summer Nights at the Kennedy. I'll be performing in Wait Until Dark which was a broadway show before it was turned into a movie starring Audrey Hepburn and Alan Arkin in which she was nominated for an Academy Award. I'll be Sgt. Carlino, the crooked Italian cop who cons the blind protagonist into thinking he's her friend. I got type-casted. Am I upset? No. I love being Italian.

Next weekend, I think I'll go see Who's Afraid of Virginia Wolfe starring Ira David Wood III and Lynda Clark at Theatre in the Park. Anyone want to accompany me?

There are more things I could put here. Things like: Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance is a really good book but so pretentious that I have a tough time wanting to continue, The Hayworth moved, the Custer filmed, the dog is deaf, and the sky is on fire. But, I won't put those things here. Maybe somewhere else....but where?

Pi and i Got in an Argument

2007-04-15T09:50:00.000-05:00

The Grill, The Netflix, and The Tea (oh the tea...)

2007-04-01T17:47:00.000-05:00

Haven't posted in a while so I figured I'd update a bit.

I love grilling. Do you have a grill? Does it use charcoal? Then you may be familiar with just the type of love I speak. Something about putting food over fire whilst holding a beer that just elates me inside. Of course, when grilling, elation is not an acceptable outward emotion for one to have. Externally, one is to be stoic and stolid, internally, well...that's your own business, and that's all part of the universal unwritten grill code. But that is all the secrets I shall share with you for now. If you'd like to know more about the secrets of the grill, see me at home. Bring fish.

Right now a song by Presidents of the United States of America just came up on iTunes shuffle. I've never heard it but it goes a little like this: "Everybody wants to be naked and famous." Hmm.........Do I? Really?

Since I got Netflix, my life has become much richer. Well, not financially richer, because they're sucking about $20/month out of my bank account, but that's because I love their service enough to make the donation. If you don't have Netflix, you're really missing out on life. I've seen over a dozen movies with it already including 2001: A Space Odyssey for the very first time. Yea, that's a weird movie. I think someone should tell me what they thought of it. What did it mean? And what's with the space fetus?

In the event that anyone reading this wasn't already awares, I love tea. I do. It's one of the most amazing things on the planet. Today, I've consumed three cups, all from different countries. First, I had Tulsi Green Tea, which is from India. Tulsi is also known as Holy Basil and is used in Ayurvedic medicine for the treatment of headaches, stomach aches, heart disease, and various poisons. It's also a COX-2 inhibitor which means it's a good pain killer. Later, I had a cup of Vanilla Comoro which contains black tea from China. And only moments ago I finished a tasty cup of Rooibus Almond which is one of the most fantastic teas I've ever had the pleasure of sipping. Rooibus is the Afrikaans word for Red Bush and is actually a legume. If you have yet to discover the wonderful world of tea (apart from Lipton, which totally doesn't count) I highly encourage you to rush out and do so. You can thank me by inviting me over for tea.

Well, Papa John just arrived with a tasty Pineapple, Mushroom, Banana Pepper pizza for me to eat. That is what I'm going to do now. Between now and then, with then being some indeterminate time in the future when I shall update Ye Ol' Ego again, I'd just like to say,
"don't drive off the freeway."

$0.99

2007-03-20T15:43:00.000-05:00

That's all it costs to stick it to the RIAA for one day. Click it:

The Illusionist

2007-03-20T05:05:00.000-05:00

Totally sucked. A dumb movie, with a 12 on the 1-10 Cheese Factor Scale (more cheese than Swissconsin). The script was horrible. Neil Berger adapted the script from the novel then directed it, so there's a point to Rockel's "writer/director sux0rz" sentiment. Some neat camera work, sub-par acting by everyone save Rufus Sewell who was pretty good at being a prick, but I don't imagine that was too hard for him. His mustache was obviously fake. Jessica Biel wasn't nearly hot enough for me to care, and her love scene, while filmed nicely, did not show nearly enough. And Edward Norton didn't do anything!! Not a thing! Why was he in that film!? Why do you pay him to do nothing but hold out his hands. He has hardly any lines and every time he speaks I'm trying to figure out why he has that ridiculous facial hair because I'm certainly not paying any attention to his lines when he delivers them with that ridiculous accent. Facial hair was the most prevalent theme in the film -- An Austrian Guide to Poor Facial Hair. Do you know how predictable that film was?! I mean it was so obvious that she (spoiler removed)! I knew she would (spoiler removed) and that he wouldn't (spoiler removed) and that he would deliver the (spoiler removed) to the inspector. I mean for a movie about magic, there was absolutely no mystery! wtf?! If you're making a film about illusions, why wouldn't you make them believable? Like in The Prestige, they did several illusions with no camera cuts or special effects. They actually said during several interviews that they wanted to use as little special effects as possible (specifically said about the field of light bulbs on the mountain filmed without gimmicks or smoke machines). They made you want to believe. The Illusionist, on the other hand, just wanted to Suck. Just a dumb, cheesy, poorly-acted, predictable film.

Delifer-iciousness

2007-02-27T20:02:00.000-05:00

The King is dead
The King is dead
Long live the King.

So, that was fun, and I got paid. At the end there I started to get a bit sick with this upper-respiratory thing. By then end of the final performance, I could hardly speak. It was a feat just making it through the show without breaking into pitch variances akin to pubescent boys. This becomes particularly worrisome when considering the fact that I have an audition Sunday night for Raleigh's Kennedy Theatre's Hot Summer Nights season. This is six shows I'm auditioning for at once! Well...one of them is precast...and I think two are musicals...but still, three shows at once! I desperately need my voice to be in speaking condition. Worrying about some kind of critical failure of the vocal chords, I hurried down to the Whole Foods to do some grocery shopping. This is a routine trip that I take each weekend, but this time, there was added purpose. I had to put to use the exhaustive knowledge of all things tea to dire use. I must contrive a concoction so therapeutic to the throat that I could sing Pavorotti by 5:30 -- that is, if I had the talent to sing Pavorotti (which I don't but if I did it would still be moot because I wasn't auditioning for the musicals...but with a voice like Pavi.....). I stood listening to the Norah on the iPod. It was a wet and dreary day and whenever that happens it's oversized sweaters and Norah Jones for me. I stared up at a whole wall of herbs and spices that actually stared back and said, "Yea, we're legal." This audacious exchange served to steel my resolve and charged me to action. Cardamom, cloves, black pepper, rosemary. Back to produce: lemon, and ginger root. I hurried home and in minutes I successfuly placed into the teapot a nice mound of shaved ginger, precisely ten caramom pods - split open - half a tablespoon of cloves and rosemary, and just a touch of fresh-ground black pepper. I proceeded to squeeze one slice of lemon into my teacup and plunked the extinguished rind and flesh into the teapot just in time to hear the kettle whistle. Five minutes later a delifer-iciousness teasane concoction of epic proportions was wilting half a tablespoon of honey from a silver spoon and filling my cup with its healing tastiness. The next fifteen minutes were pure rapture.

My throat felt great for the audition, but my condition has deteriorated since. I'm back on the upswing of the illness so I hope to be well by this weekend. That's when Tracie and I take a magical trip out to Asheville to stay at a little Bed and Breakfast. It's a late Valentine's since I had King Lear for the last two months.

I'm working my way through Poe's short stories right now and it's very fun. It was the complete works of Poe or the complete works of Oscar Wilde and I went with Poe. I'm just a depressing guy I guess.

Well, it's time for Nyquil. That stuff is sooooo tasty, especially when you're talking double dose.

Ego-Centennial

2007-02-23T07:25:00.001-05:00

Well....

There's that then.

Ninety-9

2007-02-11T19:38:00.000-05:00

Here we are one post away from 100. That's kinda neat considering my sporadic blogging habits. Here I am all woo-hooing about 100 when The Rockel just flipped over 500. I'm planning something, but it won't be some half-believable, announcement that isn't a real surprise to anyone like, "I'm moving to Angola," or something profound and insightful like, "The discussion surrounding an a priori morality is relevant only when considering whether the individuals within society are interested in reaching the same long-term societal goals," or something mind-bogglingly shocking like, "Robots are eating the brain's of the ones you love right now!" And robots don't even have a digestive system; deal with that.

King Lear opens Wednesday Feb. 14th. Details Follow:

Performance Dates:

Wednesday Feb. 14, 7:30, Preview - Pay What You Can
Thursday Feb. 15, 7:30, Preview - Pay What You Can
Friday Feb. 16, 7:30, Opening - $15.00
Saturday Feb. 17, 7:30, Performance - $15.00
Monday Feb. 19, 7:30, Performance - $15.00
Tuesday Feb. 20, 7:30, Performance - $15.00
Wednesday Feb. 21, 7:30, Performance - $15.00
Thursday Feb. 22, 7:30, Performance - $15.00
Friday Feb. 23, 7:30, Performance - $15.00
Saturday Feb. 24, 7:30, Performance - $15.00

Campbell Alumni Involved:

Andy Hayworth as The Best Stage Manager Ever in the History of Ever
Jeremy Allen as Super Save-the-Day Sound Guy
Greg Turmel as The Only Male Knight
Ryan Nazionale as Duke Albany

It's a very very cool interpretation. Shorter than the actual script (lots and lots of cuts) but the important stuff is all in their. Shakespeare was really long-winded. I don't know why he thought people would actually want to read never mind watch 4-5 hours of some loony king and his loonier (blood-thirsty) daughters.

On a completely unrelated note, I grow increasingly bitter over the bottled water craze that has continued to sweep rich, developed nations. We pay more for a gallon of water than we do for a gallon of gas. When will a water commodity market open? There is no shortage of water, yet we pay top dollar for it. Crap like Fiji that is "harvested" on an island, shipped by huge boats to neighboring islands to be bottled and then transported across the effing PACIFIC OCEAN!! to snobby Americans who think that for some reason tap water is bad for you?!?! wtf... You know how much pollution is created from you wanting water from effing FIJI?! Throw me a bone. On top of that, plastic breaks down. That bottled water has all kinds of carcinogens in it now that some of the plastic has broken down and infiltrated your water. But it's so tasty cuz it came all the way from a tiny Pacific island thousands of miles away. You know fluoride is necessary for good dental health? You think Dasani puts fluoride in their water? If people are so skeptical of the water that comes out of their taps then why don't they petition their local governments to increase the standards for tap water and then enforce those standards? I'll tell you why, because that would be too easy. They'd rather be all like, "Hey, I pay taxes for this water, but I'll spend $6.99 of my own disposable income on a six-pack of water from the grocery store. This way I can pay for my water twice, get cancer, and continue to let my elected official do the really important stuff like blow coke off a hooker's ass." I love people. Buy a water filter and do it yourself. omfg....

And because I'm a link whore, here's a couple of the coolest things I've found online in the recent past:

Post Secret - One of the most breath-taking websites I have ever seen. So simple and so moving.

Found Magazine - Remember that random note you found on the sidewalk outside the grocery store? Send it here. Then read other people's intriguing finds.

Reddit.com - In case you didn't see it over there on the sidebar or read about it on a fellow blogger's page, this is my favorite website. I waste many hours here. My profile: Th3_C0bra. As if you couldn't guess.

100 is nigh.

1-31-01

2007-02-01T20:17:00.000-05:00

Never Forget

I'm a Link-Whore, What Can I Say

2007-01-30T07:01:00.000-05:00

24

Stop watching this stupid effing show.

Yes, you, I'm talking directly to you. This show is stupid. The concept was kinda cool season one. Now, it's stupid. In case you didn't know, that's S-T-U-P-I-D. That would be an adjective meaning tedious, foolish, characterized or proceeding from mental dullness, annoying or irritating.

It's also propaganda.

Week End-Over

2007-01-28T13:24:00.000-05:00

I saw this show this weekend. It was called Pentecost and it had like 14 different spoken languages. A very interesting show about art, language, "backwards" Eastern Europe, "enlightened" Western Europe, and personal identity in regards to country of origin (and the origin itself of said country). Alot to take in and one criticism I have is that there was too much information in the script. It was all wonderful information and I think I would like to read the play sometime to try to get my mind around more of all that info. Conversely, the playwright had really done his research.

The Rockel was in town this weekend and accompanied me to the show. Actually, we ushered, which allowed us to see the show for free. There are not many better things than free theatre. The LeTrent was in the show and did a fine job -- as was to be expected. Following the show, The Rockel, The Hayworth, The Cathey, and The Nazi all went out on the town. After causing a small, yet quite absurdish scene at a local, upscale Italian restaurant, we moseyed down the block to the 42nd Street Oyster Bar: one of my favorite places downtown. Several hours later we thought that we had caused a big enough scene and stumbled out into the chilly night, each going their separate ways. Well, not each of us, cuz the Rockel was crashing here, but...you know what I mean.

If you like Monty Python, go here.

I found the absolute best article on Vegetarianism recently. It's a doozy, so if you're interested in reading it, I suggest setting aside a little bit of time. It's extremely well written and very insightful. Quotes follow:

"Broadly speaking, though, for many centuries the debate centered on three questions, each of which was reflected in Newton’s dietary choices and the objections raised to them: there was the religious question, concerning the implications of Scripture for human alimentation; there were medical questions about the effect of eating meat on human health and character; and there was a philosophical debate about the proper relationship between man and other animals. There was no distinct category you could call moral, because all of them were, as they remain, intensely moral. Vegetarianism has always been less about why you should eat plants than about why you shouldn’t eat animals. And so arguments about vegetarianism, by drawing attention to rights that we claim for ourselves but deny to other animals, inevitably involve basic questions about what it is to be human."

"One explanation of Pythagoreans’ vegetarianism was their adherence to a doctrine known as metempsychosis, or the transmigration of souls. If your soul, after death, could pass into the body of another animal species, vegetarianism was the only sure way to avoid cannibalism."

"[T]here was controversy about Adam and Eve’s dietary punishment. Some said that it was the labor of agriculture or cooking....Others, however, said that the punishment was the eating of meat. After the Fall, plants had become less nutritious, or the human body had become less able to extract nutriment from plants, and we were now metabolically obliged to kill animals and eat their flesh. Meat eating, then, was a permanent reminder of our sinfulness. Some commentators went further, saying that our fallen nature had given us a taste for blood, and that we could gauge the extent of our wickedness by our relish for the flesh of dead animals and by our willingness to make them suffer."

"Mahatma Gandhi, before reconverting to his original vegetarianism, briefly thought 'that meat eating was good, that it would make me strong and daring, and that, if the whole country took to meat eating, the English could be overcome.'"

"Descartes was at one extreme in insisting that animals were mere machines, no more capable of experiencing pain than a clock, yet even his followers had to come to terms with solid evidence that many people nonetheless felt moved by signs of animal pain. The Cartesians had a response: any such human reaction was itself just a mechanical reflex."

"Paul McCartney once said, 'If slaughterhouses had glass walls, everyone would be a vegetarian,' and it’s true that many of those who have little experience of what goes on in an abattoir are repulsed by any kind of firsthand knowledge, or even by reading vivid accounts."

"Why is it 'natural' not to know very much about 'nature'?"

"It has been estimated that forty per cent of global grain output is used to feed animals rather than people, and that half of this grain would be sufficient to eliminate world hunger if—and it’s not a small if—the political will could be found to insure equitable distribution."

Moonwalk Superstar

2007-01-23T19:34:00.000-05:00

Oh Happy Day!

2007-01-21T16:45:00.000-05:00

Today is a most happy day. One might go so far as to say "splendiferous." You are probably asking yourself, "Why, on this rainy, cold, nasty day are you in such a happy, perhaps splendiferous, mood?" I shall enlighten you.

I have my computer back.

And my own desk.

Right next to the television.

It is super awesome.

I haven't been on this thing in over a month and before then it was less than five times in several months. So, the fact that I am plugged back in is wicked awesome. YouTube, Comedy Central, and all the other wonders of the web are at my fingertips. I even logged onto AIM today (crazymunkee for those of you who forgot). I love these series of tubes. It's only a matter of time before I'm hacking away on the world of warcraft again. Mwahaha.

So, remember that dog I got that was deaf? She's awesome. You should go get one. A deaf dog, that is. You see, she never knows when I come home, so she doesn't freak out before I get to her. She doesn't care about barking dogs because she can't hear them. She isn't afraid of thunder. All of which rocks my socks.

Speaking of sock rocking, check out the new Tenacious D album "Pick of Destiny" on iTunes. If you don't have iTunes you are stupid.

Back into the tubes!

Jazmine

2007-01-15T15:14:00.000-05:00

Or just Jazz. That's what I call her. She's a dalmation and hound mix. She's got the look of the dalmation but the personality of the hound which mean she's pretty and she smells everything. She has sniffed, no joke, every square inch of carpet in this house. She's about 15 months old and Tracie and I adopted her on Saturday. She's deaf and has some food allergies. She can't eat a lot of animal proteins so she's kinda a vegetarian which is pretty cool cuz so are her new owners. She's been moved around a lot so we hope she'll be happy after she adjusts to her knew home. We've been working on some hand signals to teach her how to go for a walk, sit, lay, and other things. She can feel vibrations through the floor, too, so if we need to get her attention we just stomp. We also watch The Dog Whisperer with Cesar Milan which is a totally awesome how and if you have a dog you need to watch that show, too. Tracie and I are trying to establish ourselves as "pack leaders" by staying calm and assertive and trying to encourage Jazz to reach a calm submissive state. There's a behavior specialist that has worked with her for a while with one of her former owners and she's going to come help us on Friday using a pen light as a reinforcer. Right now, we're giving her a thumbs up to let her know she's doing right. Well, that's Jazz, if you wanna come meet her, I'm sure she'd love to meet you, too.

Hola

2006-12-28T13:53:00.000-05:00

Well, I've been hassled enough to finally decide to publish a new post. I read today that there are over 200 million blogs that are no longer updated and I didn't like being in that number. I also refuse to kill The Ego eight posts shy of 100. Hope everyone is doing well and I fully intend on becoming more blog active in the near future.

In the past few months I've completely moved in with my lady. I'm actually turning in the keys to my apartment today. This is very exciting and a little scary, which adds to the excitement - in turn making it more scary and I digress... Part of the reason there has been no post is due to this very fact: I've simply been busy moving. I'll be purchasing a Mac before the end of February and that's when my e-life should be up and running again.

I hope you all had a very merry Christmas. I sure did. I went to Roxboro (AKA "The 'Boro) to spend the holiday with the ladie's family. This was an experience indeed. I enjoyed the trip, had some good eats, and received many a wine-themed gift. Tracie bought me a grill so there may soon be an invitation sent out for a party in which there will be delicious grilled fish and veggies.

The Mendenhall's are doing swell. I saw them. Recently, in fact. They did this "Christmas Carol" thing and it was good. Then we ate some pizza at The Mellow Mushroom which was also good. I got fat and laughed a lot, again: good. I hate "A Christmas Carol." I don't know why. It might have to do with my disdain for Dickens (he was a hack who wrote periodically to newspapers, all his work is too long cuz he needed the pay), the cliche that the show has become, or just the fact that no version can out-do the Muppet's. However, every year I end up at a production and I always leave smiling. I blame Tiny Tim. Blast that cripples holiday cheer.

The New Year will be spent in Columbia, partially at a wedding, partly celebrating Christmas Part II: The My Family. I have no plans for the actual Eve of New Year's, so if you'll be in Columbia and bored and 21, call me. Resolutions follow:

1. Maintain Correspondence
2. Turn off the TV (this happens the day after the Super Bowl)
3. Write
4. Read
5. Gym
6. Budget

I figure I'll stick to at least one of those.

Theatre: I still do it. I'm in King Lear. We open in February. www.peace.edu/theatre I'll be at Peace College and they might ask me to get naked. They haven't yet. We'll see what happens (see Resolution 5). I tried to be Jesus, but I'm not fit. That's a long story, though, too long and far too personal for here. Nothing else is lined up.

I've recently had the desire to move to Spain...

Adios para ahora

Mad Libs

2006-10-03T20:07:00.000-05:00

INTRODUCING THE NEXT BIG THING: A grandiose HUMMER.
Imagine a car. A big car. A car bigger than a gerbil. Bigger than that. Gi-normous. No, even bigger than that. A car that can destroy Glacier National Park. All by itself.

Introducing the Hummer. We start with a octagon. Then we square it off. Paint it perriwinkle blue. Put on very big belt buckle. 4,395,890 of them, in fact. You will feel like Freddie Prinze Jr.. The biggest sperm whale in your neighborhood.

finagle your Prius. debilitate the environment! Trounce!. Don't wait. The atrocious Hummer.

Try for yourself: here

Doozy

2006-09-29T19:55:00.000-05:00

Alright people, there's alot of new posts below. If you're interested in subjects more like art or family, you should completely skip this post. If politics is your brew, this one is for you.

So, let's start by saying that I'm glad Slick Willy reacted the way he did. I'm a little too Italian to think that I wouldn't have reacted in the same way. My problem, though, isn't the interview, my problem is the offical response from the White House. Condi's all flappin' her jaw about and saying that they weren't given a solid strategy or plan for dealing with the Al Queda situation. I didn't believe her at first. But then I found this! And then this!! And now, I know the truth.

And, because he's funny, here's what Jon Stewart said about the issue:

But that's not what's really bothering me.

What's bothering me is the piece of legislation that was passed by the Senate today. With the stroke of a pen, the reputation and good will of the United States of America which took over 200 years to build, was destroyed. America has stooped to the lowest of the low when she may espouse only two years ago that "freedom from torture is an inalienable human right" and that the "United States is committed to the world-wide elimination of torture and we are leading this fight by example" and in the next breath pass legislation that would grant legality to this!

The NY Times (that old rag) calls it "our generation’s version of the Alien and Sedition Acts" for how it allows the executive to arbitrarily decide who is and isn't a terrorist and whether or not they have any right to challenge his authority.

I like Barak Obama alot. I like how he has the credibility and respect of the African Nations. I'd really like to see him make a run for VP in 2008. He voted against this legistlation, and he urged others to do so as well. "But politics won today. Politics won. The Administration got its vote, and now it will have its victory lap, and now they will be able to go out on the campaign trail and tell the American people that they were the ones who were tough on the terrorists."

"The bill also expands the definition of an unlawful enemy combatant to cover anyone who has “has purposefully and materially supported hostilities against the United States.” Quick, define “purposefully and materially.” One person has already been charged with aiding terrorists because he sold a satellite TV package that includes the Hezbollah network." (source)

Since the elected officials put in place in order to ask tough questions of the executive and keep him in check have failed to do so, someone else has to ask the questions around here: Do you believe the Administration has over the past five years earned the colossal expanse of trust the Congress is about to give it in the name of fighting terrorism? Do you believe that Administration officials will be able to accurately and adequately identify so-called "enemy combatants" here at home so as to separate out the truly bad guys from the guys who just happen to be in the wrong place at the wrong time? Did you want your legislative branch to abdicate so completely its responsibility to ensure that there are adequate checks and balances upon executive power even in a time of terror? You might have answered "no" to all three questions. But your answer doesn't matter. And neither does mine. To Congress, the answer is "yes, sir." (source)

Why is the Congress so bent on dissolving its own power? It seems with each passing year, the executive becomes more and more powerful. More signing statements, more secrecy, less oversight, more ways to go over, under, or around the legislative branch all of which are granted under the pretext that we are in a time of war.

I am not even kidding when I say my heart hurt today. My heart hurt for the USA. Last night I went and saw Burning Coal's production of 1776. Fantastic. Check out their blog on the list. But my point is, I must've been on some sort of Nationalistic/Patriotic high from learning more about the lives of the founding fathers. Maybe that's why I was so upset today. But I had the overwhelming feeling that this was a black day on American history.

Mule Days

2006-09-29T19:53:00.000-05:00

How far they've come. I never attended. I never once heard a good Mule Days story. They've always been about getting beat up, arrested, or raped. I'm super-serial.

The Homefront

2006-09-29T19:41:00.000-05:00

Parents: How to love your daughter.

Children: I know that you have responsible parental units when the shirt says, "Your Boyfriend is a Good Kisser" and the parents say, "I know she's a sweet girl, and I know that she's very conservative and is not sexually active."

Dog: Moldy grilled cheese sandwiches, trunk's of trees, and now...

Art

2006-09-29T19:31:00.000-05:00

Did anyone hear about this woman who got in a boatload of trouble with the entire school district because she took students to the museum and they saw nude art. This kinda stuff makes me so bitter. I mean what do parent's honestly expect when they send their kids to the museum?! It's not like the teacher did this!

When Theatre Attacks!

I become simply giddy when someone takes a crap all over the RIAA's breakfast.

By far the coolest clouds ever photographed in the history of ever.

I don't often do movie plugs, but he is Ironman and Jon Favreau is directing.

Courtney Love's Jesus

Charts and Graphs

2006-09-29T19:17:00.000-05:00

And remember Timmy, it's not how smart you are. It's how smart you think you are.

I'm so excited! Someone finally did a graphic analysis of intelligence versus beauty.

Best chart I've seen in months

From the Horses' Mouth

2006-09-25T22:38:00.000-05:00

In 30 Seconds

2006-09-25T22:11:00.000-05:00

Bunnies

Stuff and Things

2006-09-25T21:55:00.000-05:00

Hello Good Citizens,

It is I. And as in I, I mean Ego, as in Sigmund Freud in your face. What?!

Anyway, it's been an emotional Monday Night what with the Saints marching back into New Orleans and whupping on them Falcons. That's pretty painful. Atlanta doesn't have a fan in that building.

I closed An American Daughter this Sunday and it was swell fun. Met some very very cool people, got my foot in the door with another theatre in town. I'm doing King Lear in February with Peace College and I may be working on a show with Burning Coal in Oct. which takes place in a cemetery. Sounds wicked cool to me.

The Poetry Bus is coming to Durham Oct. 6th. I'm doing my damndest to be there. Check out Th3_C0bra's Xanga for at least one (and eventually, hopefully, more) poem by one of the featrued artists.

Is Jon Stewart planning a presidential run? Or do you think its just that Hollywood really wants him to? I don't know. But I would vote for him.

For all my married readers (yes, you) and all my single readers, too (that's the rest of you -- whom I think stand to gain the most from this): never forget your aniversary again. Gives new meaning to "burning ring of fire."

Get an IV league education for free.

No Funny Business Today, Fo'ks

2006-09-21T22:33:00.000-05:00

Hey there, hi there, ho there lads and lassies!

In case you haven't noticed by the comments left on your blogs, I can now leave comments on your blogs!! HUZZAH!!! Now, you have no choice but to hear me.

In honor of the fact that I can post comments on all your blogs, I invite you all to comment on this, ostensibly, politic free post. Without further ado, here's some wicked interesting things from today that, hopefully, won't piss off anyone who believes anything.

We'll start with this awesome story which offers yet another reason why the vegetarian lifestyle can do nothing but good things for you and your health. GO VEG!
Recently, The Cavorting Celt published this post about Claudia Mitchell's new bionic arm. In case your wondering how it works, here's a super-sweet article about how the doctors managed to use nerve endings in her chest to receive the signals her brain was sending to her arm (which her brain still recognized as existing) and then move the appropriate parts of the arm, often simultaneously.
Random picture that r0x0r
Guess what I majored in...
Of course, my vote is for the Italian Renaissance.
Motorcycle Roller coaster?!?!
Talk about a filthy stinking drunk.

Well my collective mon freres, this is your favorite linguistic master saying "Adios..."

for now...

Green Screen Challenge

2006-09-21T22:31:00.000-05:00

The Cobra's Global Initiative

2006-09-20T20:05:00.000-05:00

Good day, citizens!

Oh, how I wish I could comment on your blogs. It is a sad day whenever I read a cohorts blog and cannot write some witty remark in reply. But soon, you will be in BloggerBeta, or BloggerBeta will stop sucking. Until then, here's some current events:

The Faith of Foot Licking

Princeton reviews Diebold's electronic voting machine

Diebold Responds

"Let us suppose, for the sake of argument, that the war declared by al-Qaeda and other Islamists is under way....If such war is under way, there are ten good reasons why, as things stand, Islam will not be defeated in it." I like #2.

I've read ten books on this list

I just watched the film Waiting for Guffman. Funny movie. You should see it.

I've also been seeing alot of Bill Clinton lately. He's promoting his Global Initiative and I really like it. Perhaps I will post on that soon. They really do amazing work, like bringing sterile surgical tools to clinics and helping to create sterile water systems in under-developed areas of Africa. The coolest part, is they make people sign their names on the dotted line. So, once you commit, since you're a private individual and not a corrupt government, you can be held accountable in a REAL court of law. But you see, no one gets sued. They just follow-through. It's effing brilliant.

In reverence to Clinton's Global Initiative, I've decided to start The Cobra's Global Initiative. My mission is simple: to get everyone to, once a day, when someone/thing is causing you ire, shake your fist in response to their humbuggery. I believe that this will lower stress all over the nation and violent crime rates will be reduced -- certainly road rage.

Apologists Need Not Apply

2006-09-20T05:50:00.000-05:00

Support our President!!

Existentialist Cowboy

"It’s unacceptable to think" -- W.

"We are conducting military operations inside Iran right now." -- U.S. Air Force Colonel Sam Gardiner.

Senate NSA Approval

More NSA Approval

Stop NSA Approval

Oil down, approval up

Nobody Expects the Spanish Inquisition

2006-09-18T21:15:00.000-05:00

So yea, Blogger in Beta isn't as super awesome as I had originally anticipated. Can't comment on non-beta blogs, can't post YouTube files, can't get any new super sweet templates. It's kinda lame. So, we wait for it to come OUT of Beta. Until then, here's some interesting headlines:

Be heard.

The Associated Press is a terrorist organization

Microsoft vs. Apple Round 3

Walking Shark found in Bird's Head

Silly Walk Generator

And I also heard that gas was going to continue to fall in price as we get closer to the electi.....Thanksgiving.

In lighter news, I finished The Brothers Karamazov. Such a good book. I'm not sure how I feel about the ending. So much uncertainty. There's also the deification of a major character. Granted, Doestoevsky makes no bones about who the hero of the novel is. He tells you in the opening chapter. Regardless, if you haven't read this book, I highly(!) recommend it. One of the most intriguing parts of the novel goes like this:

Many many moons ago, in a small town in Spain, Jesus returned to Earth. This was during the height of the Inquisition. While Jesus was performing his first miracles, during his first hour back on Earth, the Grand Inquisitor sees him, catches him in the act. The Inquisitor looks at Jesus, and has him arrested, so great is the power that he holds through fear. What follows in the prison of the Inquisition is the Grandest Inquisition ever heard. Jesus listens unflinchingly, uninteruptively. The Inquisitor breaks down the three temptations of Christ in the desert, and how through those three denials of Christ (bread, angelic protection, and the ultimate denial of power and control), He had relinquished all his control over men, for if any man controls the means of sustenance and protection for the masses, that man will be he who is worshipped by the people, for Man is weak, and not perfect, like Christ, and not capable of refusing such dire, neccesary and base elements of this world.
So, the inquisitor, in closing says to Christ "thou cantst return," since He had already passed the keys. The Inquisitor's position was that so long as the Papacy existed and that that order which possessed the keys to the Kingdom of God was held infallable in the eyes of Man and God, that Jesus had no right to come back and that it would undo all He had wrought.

One other story, also of strong religious connotations goes like this:

An agnostic man, strong in his disbelief in God and all faiths, notorious among he community and peers for being such a devout agnostic died. And when he died he found himself in a great void, alone. A voice echoed through the darkness that he was to walk a Trillion miles at the end of which he would arive at the gates of heaven. Hearing this, he scoffed, and lay down, and went to sleep.
There he sat, now sleeping, now awake, for many thousands of years, when suddenly, one day, perhaps consumed by boredom, the man rose and began walking. And after an eternity he arrived at the gates of heaven and was welcomed into the Kingdom whereupon he exclaimed, through weeping eyes that he would walk a Trillion Trillions of miles to be there in the presence of the Lord.

Read this book.

I need a new one. I'm debating One Hundred Years of Solitude, Arabian Knights, or Pilgrim's Progress. You can vote in the new poll!

Well, all, it's Daily Show time. Hopefully I'll be able to put up some video's soon, for there are a few I'd like to discuss with ya'll.

Ego 2.0 (Beta)

2006-09-11T22:48:00.000-05:00

Ahoy hoy readers!

If you're a member of Blogger, then you should have heard about the new Blogger Beta. In case you hadn't noticed, I've updated. Again, I effectively display how much more awesome I am than you. I'm all ahead of the blogging curve, forging ahead into Beta mode while all your "Pre-Beta" bloggers are floundering about in that old-school world of Blogger 1.o. Here's a break down of how I feel about it.

Template editing is super-sweet. Drag and drop elements such as links and pictures all over without having to edit lines of code I don't understand.
I can't comment on your old, prehistoric blogs. Update!! Immediately! So that I might troll your blog with incessant, egotistical babblings and ravings.
And the new look and feel is pleasing to me, and me is all that matters.

There are some very cool, very new links listed to the right as well. I highly recommend some of them, not all of them, though all of them are cool, all of them are not "highly" recommended as there wouldn't be a "best" link (which is obviously the one that says "Go Veg!").

Many people have been newly endorsed. Let me be the first to congratulate you. CONGRATULATIONS!!!! You have recently been found worthy of The Cobra's endorsement. You will soon be the envy of all your blogging cohorts...except for those who are also on the list, in which case, I've prepared the following dialogue to help you feel superior to them.

You: I just got endorsed by The Cobra! My blog totally kicks your blogs ass!

Them: Uh, no. I've been endorsed by The Cobra for like almost a year now.

You: No you haven't.

And with that, citizen, you have indisputably proven the superiority of your blog. This can also be accomplished by putting the word "superior" (or some derivative thereof) into the title of your blog, but then you'd be copying me, the greatest blogger ever.

I would like to draw your attention to the Propaganda Pipeline. This is done by the Hayworth and frequently makes me laugh right out loud. Visit his page. Laugh out loud. It'll be great. You'll love it.

Expect continued changes from the Ego as time goes on and Blogger lets me do more cooler things that you can't do because you're all living in the dark ages.

Wrestling with Katherine Harris

2006-08-28T19:55:00.000-05:00

Many many moons ago, December 22 to be exact, Matthew Kay Rockel posted a link to Ultimate Christian Wrestling. Intrigued, I perused the site fervently stumbling upon this very interesting site. This "very interesting site" is at the crux of this post (at least it comprises one-third of the crux of this post). It's about the history of America. Specifically, the history of The Bible in America. It's a page about how Christianity was a major influence in the founding of America and even played a serious role in the drafting of both The Declaration of Independence and The Constitution. It provides such intersting quotes as:

"Consider these words by John Adams, our second president, who also served as chairman of the American Bible Society. In an address to military leaders he said, 'We have no government armed with the power capable of contending with human passions, unbridled by morality and true religion. Our constitution was made only for a moral and religious people. It is wholly inadequate to the government of any other.'"

"Consider these words from George Washington, the Father of our Nation, in his farewell speech on September 19, 1796: 'It is impossible to govern the world without God and the Bible. Of all the dispositions and habits that lead to political prosperity, our religion and morality are the indispensable supporters. Let us with caution indulge the supposition that morality can be maintained without religion. Reason and experience both forbid us to expect that our national morality can prevail in exclusion of religious principle.'"

"Bible reading was now unconstitutional , though the Bible was quoted 94 percent of the time by those who wrote our constitution and shaped our Nation and its system of education and justice and government."

So, as you can probably guess, it digresses into a diatribe about how Christianity is under attack in this modern, ultra-liberal America which we find ourselves. When I read this -- many many moons ago -- it weighed heavily on me and I found it quite interesting and even wondered if it was true that so many of these founding fathers were so devout as this page unsupportively claims.

That was until today. When I found this extremely interesting page. Not only does it stand in brazen oppossition to the Forsaken Roots article, but it even sites sources. The website makes such claims:

"George Washington, the first president of the United States, never declared himself a Christian according to contemporary reports or in any of his voluminous correspondence....On his deathbed, Washinton uttered no words of a religious nature and did not call for a clergyman to be in attendance."

"It was during [John] Adam's administration that the Senate ratified the Treaty of Peace and Friendship, which states in Article XI that 'the government of the United States of America is not in any sense founded on the Christian Religion.'"

Now, let's make this a little more current. Today, I read this interview with Katherine Harris in which she offers unto us ignorant lay-people her absolutely ingenious interpretation of the constitution:

"...salt and light means not just in the church and not just as a teacher or as a pastor or a banker or a lawyer, but in government and we have to have elected officials in government and we have to have the faithful in government and over time, that lie we have been told, the separation of church and state, people have internalized, thinking that they needed to avoid politics and that is so wrong because God is the one who chooses our rulers."

Now, I've never heard of Katherine Harris before today, but from what my lady-friend tells me, she had alot to do with some disenfrachisment in Florida back in 2000. She also voted 100% of the time in line with the Christian Coalition.

So, query:

Is the separation of church and state a lie? Regardless, is the religious affiliation of our founding fathers, either individually or as a whole (i.e. mostly Christian, mostly Deist, mostly atheistic), relevant in determining the validity of the constitutitionality of the separation of church and state? How so and why or why not?

Long Time No Speaky Speaky

2006-08-19T09:49:00.000-05:00

Dear Ego,

Howdy. How you been? Haven't talked to you for a while. I've been neglecting you, I know. I've just been busy. What with working this job at First Citizens. I sit in a cube. It's kinda lame, but the pay is good. In my spare time, I've been hitting the gym and getting in shape. I haven't been the the gym in the last week because I started work at Theatre in the Park at Pullen Park. I have a very tiny tiny role and they don't pay anything but maybe it will lead to better things down the road. Otherwise life is pretty peachy and I can't really complain and even if I did no one would want to hear it.
But I know no one ever reads this thing anymore, so, I'm gonna complain.

The President of the United States, a creature of the same Constitution which gave us these amendments, has undisputedly violated the Fourth in failing to procure judicial orders as required by FISA, and accordingly has volated the First Amendment Rights of these Plaintiffs as well.
Jill Carroll, a freelance reporter for The Christian Science Monitor, was kidnapped by Sunni Muslim insurgents in Baghdad on Jan. 7, 2006. Over the next 82 days, she was shuttled blindfolded among at least six safe houses and had closer contact with Sunni insurgents than any American who has lived to tell the tale. This is her story. This is the first in a multi-part series of which I have read the first four. I highly encourage you to take the time to read all of them. It's really freakin' good...and kinda scary (in a not so "kinda" kinda way).
"Basically we are not looking for — working for the bomb," the president said. "The problem that President Bush has is in his mind he wants to solve everything with bombs. The time of the bomb is in the past. It's behind us. Today is the era of thoughts, dialogue and cultural exchanges." -- Mahmoud Ahmadinejad
Snakes on a Plane
Fight Poverty: Give Cows

Well, Ego, I gotta get going. Thanks for listening. I've got lots to do today including seeing Snakes on a Plane which is totally in line with classic B-films. Anyone who appreciates such awesome films like The Blob, The Fly, Attack of the Killer Tomatoes, or Killer Clowns from Outer Space is practically required to go see this film, and I, fortunately, am in that very bizarre demographic.

I also need to find a new book. I read the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy at work in ten days. I finished in the morning of the day of my 30-day review, at which I was told not to read anymore. But still, that book totally rocked my whole face off and you need to go read it right now. Maybe I'll try The Silmarillion again. Back at CU, I borrowed Andie's copy and only made about a fourth of the way through but I think I'm ready for it now. I also am about halfway done with Plato's The Republic. It's over 300 pages of Socratic dialogue, so I have to read it in parts. I just finished the best part about Plato's creation of the philosopher-king. Afterwards, irony punched me in the kidney.

Take care of yourself, Ego.

Sincerely,

--The Cobra

My Eyes Have Seen You

2006-06-21T08:34:00.000-05:00

I took these pictures:

Rob Brind'Amour, meet Lord Stanley

2006-06-20T09:54:00.000-05:00

C.S. Lewis

2006-06-11T08:13:00.000-05:00

Shadowlands

It's a story about C.S. Lewis. Well, not so much a "story" as it is a "play." Well, not a "play" but just a play. Well not just a play, it's a spectacular theatre experience hosted by the good people at Arising Light Productions.

Dates: June 16, 17, 22, 23 @ 8PM

June 24 @ 2 PM

Shows are in Raleigh off of Glenwood Ave. near Pleasant Valley Rd. next to a Heavenly Ham. Visit Arising Light's website for directions and tickets, or buy them at the door, but if they sell out, that's a personal problem.

Come see our show!

"I don't believe there's any issue that's more important than this one"

2006-06-07T09:29:00.000-05:00

Senator David Vitter ladies and gentlemen.

Needless to say, I disagree.

St. Elsewhere

2006-06-05T11:22:00.000-05:00

I done told you once.

In April, the band's bass-heavy single, "Crazy," topped the British singles chart as the first track to reach No. 1 based on computer download sales alone.

(source)

Why You Should Support the President

2006-06-03T13:10:00.000-05:00

Signing Statements
The NSA Surveillance Program
The Patriot Act
Hurricane Katrina
Ban on Stem Cell Research
War in Iraq
War in Afghanistan
"Mission Accomplished"
Re-Classify De-Classified Information
320+ Vacation Days
Stoppin' 'em queers ferm gettin' merreed
Nepotism
WMD's

And

For Him Being the Decider

[que fanfare]

Memorial Day Post

2006-05-29T11:46:00.000-05:00

12/18/1955 - 10/29/1992

Just Like A Woman...

2006-05-26T18:55:00.000-05:00

...to play Bob Dylan

Spanglish

2006-05-25T15:37:00.000-05:00

So, in the midst of an all out immigration war on the home-front, our esteemed president wants to make English the National Language. This is different from the current system insofar that English is, right now, only our "official" language. The only major change that will result in the shift from "official" to "National" is that individuals and organizations would be able to deny people goods and services if they do not speak English.

Ask me: What's wrong with that?

Nothing on the surface. It stands to reason that individuals speaking a language other than English would be forced to seek out alternative providers of goods and services; ones that specialize in serving individuals with said linguistic "deficiencies." This is great for competition and capitalism as a whole. We will provide a federally sponsored program for major corporate conglomerates to expand and even price discriminate against individuals who speak foreign languages due to the "hardship" imposed on the company for having to "deal" with non-English speaking individuals. This starts off sounding good...and moves to bad. Did you see that shift? It happened around "federally sponsored program."

Additionally, any and all public services could (and WILL!!) be denied to individuals speaking foreign languages. What happens here is that anyone who needs emergency care will be denied that service if they can't fill out this form, in triplicate, in English. It also means that any foreign speaking persons wanting to reserve the baseball field at the local state park will be denied said service. It also means no welfare for foreigners, which sounds all well and good, but many of them are less likely to apply for welfare than English speaking, US Citizens (source).

I don't understand why this topic was even brought up by our esteemed leader, George Herbert Walker Bush, as he has enough on his plate to concern himself with than something like this. I mean, when I hear people speak in support of English as the national language, I can't help but wonder "What Would Hitler Do?" And I think he would make Aryan the National Race, too.

In conclusion, I would like to say that I side with those that call this racism. I sincerely believe that this is directed at Spanish speaking individuals. Do I feel concern over whether this will pass? No. I'm sure this type of legislation has been suggested in the past during periods of high immigration by persons from Asia and Europe. Our nation needs be less xenophobic than it has already grown to be, and support of this type of legislation does nothing more than further an ideology of intolerance and fear.

However, I would support any legislation that called for Spanglish as the national language.

It's Alive!

2006-05-19T08:48:00.000-05:00

No, it's not Jell-O. But, speaking of Jell-O, I never knew why anyone would eat anything who's slogan was "It's Alive!" I prefer to eat things that have been dead, and for some time. That's also assuming I'm eating something that had at one point been alive, which is a rarity indeed.

On a less gelatinous note, I, as Jell-O, am alive, but not in the wiggly, jiggly, been in the fridge for several hours kinda way. Moreso, I'm alive in a "I have yet to kick the bucket and join the bleeding choir almighty" kinda way. I graduated from college and now have my MBA. Hizzah! To celebrate, the Rockel bought me one of these:

For those of you unawares, or illiterate (and if this is the case, why you have ventured to the Ego is beyond me), that is Johnny Walker Blue Label "The Connoisseurs' Blend." The age of the whiskey (Scotch whiskey) is uncertain, but they are all kept for a minimum of 25 years, maturing in oak, with a strong peaty flavor yet remarkably smooth to the palate. So smooth, in fact, that we polished off a fifth of this ridiculously expensive liquor in an evening at the end of which we walked a mile and a half across Harnett County back to 30-Dizzle from a raucous party full of recent grads and a bonfire. I remember little of the trek back, but I recorded some thoughts on my phone including this message to myself:

"The Rockel wishes I was bald."

Bastardo.

That's spanish for "bastard."

I'm a linguistics genius.

Since then I've been diligently preparing to move to Raleigh. I'll be living next door to Cameron Village, so anyone looking to have a good time in the downtown metropolitan areas should look me up as you would not have to drive anywhere -- which totally rocks face. As far as work is concerned: HA! But seriously, I need a job. You wanna pay me 40K a year to do nothing? No? Maybe someone else will. Hell, I have my MBA.

I'm currently working on a production of Shadowlands, directed by Luke Custer, with Arising Light Productions. Buy tickets online and come see my show. It'll be great, you'll love it.

The force most responsible for my absence in the 'blog world has been my computer. After successfully discovering the cure for e-AIDS, I reinstalled the World of Warcraft and have since been fervently attempting to make hunter Grimthaka and his pet tiger, Tang, a dual force to be reckoned with. I am currently level 22 and need to get to 60. So, in the event of another prolonged absence, go to Wal-Mart, buy World of Warcraft, join the Horde, create a character in the server "Zul'jin," send Grimthaka a tell (and money) and we can have a wonderful fantasy conversation in a world that does not exist -- but, oh, how we love to pretend it does.

Speaking of which, there are Kodo Beasts and Deepweater Moss Spiders that need being slain today. So, adieu (there I go with the linguistics, again). In the meantime, listen to some Gnarls Barkley. They are a new hip-hop group coming to you as a collaboration of former Goody Mob member, Cee-Lo, and DJ Danger Mouse. Both are very good at what they do and they bring a strong, positive message through hip-hop music with sick-nasty, progressive beats. Check out the video for "Crazy" at Yahoo! Launch for a serious mind trip.

Free-Dumb Strikes Again

2006-04-18T12:53:00.000-05:00

This time in China.

Discuss

2006-04-16T21:02:00.000-05:00

"If life's not beautiful without the pain, well I'd just rather never ever even see beauty again."
--Modest Mouse The View

OH, HIZZAH!

2006-04-14T10:01:00.000-05:00

photo courtesy RachelC

And there was much rejoicing...

yay...

You see how I did that? With the winning of the war? I don't mess around. I get Blogger on my side. Indeed, the 'blog gods saw fit to thwart the Rockel, placing themselves firmly on the side of the Ego. I am a bit saddened, however. I had some marvellous ideas brewing about, including a bit about joining the "Nazi" party as suggested by one AlohaAmby. Ah, well, I have won and that is all that is important. No, wait, it's not. Rockel lost. That, too, is important, and vastly so. So, no more tooly bits (for now), and no more war. Alas, if America's wars were this fun, entertaining, bloodless, and winnable...

Rockel - 0

Ego - 1

w00t

This is Where Rockel Lives:

2006-04-11T16:17:00.001-05:00

That's a toolbox. It's a box for tools. Actually, it's my toolbox. That means that Rockel is my tool. Do not be mislead: the Rockel works for me. I'm so good at 0wn1n9 the Rockel that he has no clue that I've been using him such.

P.S. Rockel is the tooliest tool in my box of tools.

Dear Matthew Kay Rockel,

2006-04-10T21:53:00.000-05:00

Don't F with me.

The First Step

2006-04-10T21:38:00.000-05:00

I know.
It's tough.
It hurts,
Sometimes.

The vicious cycle
Of your daily life
Is crippling
Your deceit.

It's time.
Fess up.
Only then
Can recov'ry begin.

And just in case you want me to spell it out for you, that's cuz your a tool and you need to amit it.

Here's a visual representation:

Take your pick. That one's Rockel. With his own little pouch to protect him from the oooh-scary world.

Oh, no he didn't!

2006-04-10T20:15:00.000-05:00

It's one thing to jump all up and down like "Aspartame won't give you Cancer, just lymphona, holes in your brain, fat thighs, and retarded babies."

But you crossed the line...

The American Heart Association likes vegetarianism:

"Numerous studies comparing vegetarians and nonvegetarians have reported lower levels of serum cholesterol and lower mortality rates in the former"

"A vegetarian diet appears to induce blood pressure reduction in hypertensive individuals"

"Similarly, high-fiber vegetarian diets have also been associated with reduced risk of obesity." Source

"Most vegetarian diets are low in animal products. They’re also usually lower than nonvegetarian diets in total fat, saturated fat and cholesterol. Many studies have shown that vegetarians seem to have a lower risk of obesity, coronary heart disease (which causes heart attack), high blood pressure, diabetes mellitus and some forms of cancer.
Vegetarian diets can be healthful and nutritionally sound if they’re carefully planned to include essential nutrients." Source

"I had three arteries with anywhere from 90 to 99 percent blockage. After the surgery, he told me to 'be a vegetarian,' which I 'took to heart.' He also said, "At the age of 40, you have the coronary arteries of a 65-year-old." That was in 1983, so it's been many years since I had the surgery. I've had no return of symptoms, and my last treadmill test was fine." Source

As does the American Cancer Society:

"Some studies have linked vegetarian diets to lower risk for heart disease, diabetes, high blood pressure, obesity, and certain types of cancer (i.e., colon cancer)."

"Many vegetarianism proponents believe a vegetarian diet promotes health because it contains less saturated fat, protein, and cholesterol than omnivorous diets. ... Vegetarian diets also provide more fiber, vitamins, minerals, antioxidants, and phytochemicals (plant chemicals) than diets containing meat."

"Studies indicated an increased risk of colon and prostate cancer with increased animal fat intake. An increase in the consumption of beans and lentils appeared to decrease the risk of colon cancer and prostate cancer."

"A population study in Germany found the death rate for colon cancer was lower among moderate and strict vegetarians compared with that of the general population." Source

And so does the American Medical Association:

"The findings of Davidson et al 1 support their conclusion that "free-living persons can effectively incorporate lean red meats into their diets ... without compromising the lipid-lowering benefits of the diet" only if one concedes that such diets, in fact, have virtually no lipid-lowering effect at all."

"A low-fat vegetarian diet can reduce the need for cholesterol-lowering drugs and cardiac surgery. Unlike drugs or surgery, its side effects are entirely desirable, including weight loss, blood pressure reduction, and better diabetic control. " Source

"Vegetarian adolescents were significantly more likely than nonvegetarian adolescents to meet the Healthy People 2010 objectives. This was particularly noteworthy for total fat (70% vs 48%), saturated fat (65% vs 39%), daily servings of vegetables (26% vs 14%), and 5 or more servings of fruits and vegetables (39% vs 28%). Vegetarians were also less likely to eat fast food or drink regular soda and fruit drinks. " Source

Not to mention those looney, alternative medicine, holistic fo'k:

"Reviewing 200 cases of so-called spontaneous regression of cancer, Canadian professor Harold Foster, Ph.D., found in 1988 that the great majority of these people (88 percent) had made major dietary changes-usually switching to a strictly vegetarian diet" Source

And what's this: Sports Science?

0wn3d.

En Gaurde!

2006-04-08T20:20:00.000-05:00

Wikipedia cites:

The proven abilityof aspartame to inhibit the glucose-induced release of serotonin within the brain may also affect behaviors, such as satiety and sleep.

Methanol has no therapeutic properties and is considered only as a toxicant. The ingestion of two teaspoons is considered lethal inhumans.

"is considered a cumulative poison due to the low rate of excretion once it is absorbed. In the body, methanol is oxidized to formaldehyde and formic acid; both of these metabolites are toxic."

They also cite:

"It was a very interesting paper, that demonstrates that formaldehyde formation from aspartame ingestion is very common and does indeed accumulate within the cell, reacting with cellular proteins (mostly enzymes) and DNA (both mitochondrial and nuclear). The fact that it accumulates with each dose, indicates grave consequences among those who consume diet drinks and foodstuffs on a daily basis."

There's even lawsuits:

Lawsuits were filed in three separate California courts against twelve companies who either produce or use the artificial sweetener aspartame as a sugar substitute in their products.

The suits allege that the food companies committed fraud and breach of warranty by marketing products to the public such as diet Coke, diet Pepsi, sugar free gum, Flintstone's vitamins, yogurt and children's aspirin with the full knowledge that aspartame, the sweetener in them, is neurotoxic. Aspartame is a drug masquerading as an additive. It interacts with other drugs, has a synergistic and addictive effect with MSG, and is a chemical hyper-sensitization agent

And don't forget the conspiracies:

Contained in the lawsuit is the key role played by current Secretary of Defense, Donald Rumsfeld in helping to get aspartame pushed through the FDA. Back in the 1980s, Rumsfeld was the President and CEO of Searle who originally owned the patent on aspartame. Plaintiffs maintain that Rumsfeld used his political muscle to get aspartame approved by the FDA despite objections of many FDA health researchers and negative studies

Say it! No ideas but in things.

'Blog Wars are Fun

2006-04-08T20:00:00.000-05:00

Nuclear wars are not.

Matthew Kay Rockel

2006-04-08T17:45:00.000-05:00

For those of you that weren't aware:

Matthew Rockel, of Red What and Blue, has the middle name "Kay." That's a girl's name.*

For those of you that weren't aware:

In our experimental conditions, it has been demonstrated, for the first time, that [Aspartame] causes a statistically significant, dose related increase in lymphomas and leukaemia in females at dose levels very near those to which humans can be exposed.

The first results of our study call for urgent re-examination of permissable exposure levels of [Aspartame] in both food and beverages, especially to protect children.

For those of you that weren't aware:

Scientists agree that approximately 10% of aspartame (by mass) is broken down into methanol in the small intestine. Most of the methanol is absorbed and quickly converted into formaldehyde. Some scientists believe...the levels of methanol and particularly formaldehyde have been proven to cause chronic toxicity in humans, and the low levels of methanol and formaldehyde in human metabolism are tightly-controlled such that significant increases from aspartame ingestion are not safe.

Phenylalanine is an amino acid commonly found in foods. Approximately 50% of aspartame (by mass) is broken down into phenylalanine. Because aspartame is metabolized and absorbed very quickly (unlike phenylalanine-containing proteins in foods), it is known that aspartame could spike blood plasma levels of phenylalanine.

Based on case histories from aspartame users, measuring levels of neurotransmitters in the brains of animals and measuring the potential of aspartame to cause seizures in animals, some scientists believe that aspartame may affect neurotransmitter production. They believe that even a moderate spike in blood plasma phenylalanine levels from typical ingestion may have adverse consequences in long-term use. They are especially concerned that the phenylalanine can be concentrated in fetal brains to a potentially neurotoxic level...they feel that humans are approximately 5-6 times more susceptible to the effects of excitotoxins than are rodents...they are particularly concerned with potential effects in infants and young children

For those of you that weren't aware:

Matthew Rockel is
Retarded and super lame.
He can't count to five.

* Actually it's an Old Welsh boy's name. That makes him a sheep shagger.

Llamas

2006-04-06T12:28:00.000-05:00

Kinda

Play my contest!!

YOUR MOM GOES TO COLLEGE!!

2006-03-30T21:11:00.000-05:00

Now, you and I both know that this is the ultimate, super-awesome, "you got totally burned," cut-down ever to be invented in the history of the dozens.

But it's time to take this a step further. Just like "your mom" evolved into "your mom is so fat/ugly/stinky/nasty/furry" etc. we must expand the "your mom goes to college" insult to epic social proportions.

With that said, I'm starting a totally awesome contest. Grand Prize is a personalized congratulatory blog entry all about you with your name in the title. That's right, your name, in the title bar, of THE COBRA's blog. Thanks me later.

Here's the contest:

Come up with the sweetest "your mom goes to college" joke.

That's it.

Here's a few that so rock and don't count for the contest. Otherwise, I would have already won.

I totally saw your mom filling out a FAFSA yesterday.

Did your mom get that scholarship?

I just saw your mom buying a scantron from the bookstore.

So there are some examples. Hit me with your best shot and good luck to all!!!

Re-Direction

2006-03-29T23:47:00.000-05:00

Constitutional Asswipe

Opium

I WIN!

Beer

Sharon Stone

Tiny Asian People

World Tea Expo

2006-03-29T08:18:00.000-05:00

I wanna gooooooo.....

A Pretty Lady in Spain

2006-03-24T10:41:00.000-05:00

This is my girlfriend!! She's a beautiful woman spending three months in Spain. Her blog is atop the list of endorsees. Please visit her blog (and all the others on my list) as she has had many splendiferous adventures already. She would love to hear from people in America and I believe much of her experience will provide an excellent forum for discussion on the trade of culture in an increasingly global economy.....it's the subject of my latest literary venture.

Mis Aventuras

I miss my pretty lady...

Free-dumb of Religion

2006-03-22T12:45:00.000-05:00

I love how America marches into other countries and topples their government, installs their own, then builds oil pipelines for the Vice President's former Corporation (that's Halliburton). I'm talking about Afghanistan. The Taliban was an oppressive, murderous form of government that harbored terrorists (I'm being serious). So, toppling that regime wasn't sooooo bad. I'm just a little bitter that they lied about why they did it.

Alot of people have forgotten about Afghanistan but this article brought a very strong reminder to me.

I can't believe that we totally overthrew their government on the basis that it was an oppressive theocracy, then allowed them to write a contradictory constitution that claims to allow freedom of religion while at the same time making conversion from Islam to any other religion a capital offense. This guy has one defense: that he is mad. Otherwise, they'll kill him because he loves Jesus.

Let's chalk up another notch for the War on Terror and the spread of democracy in the Middle East.

An Intelligence Issue

2006-03-21T09:17:00.001-05:00

"Budget constraints are forcing some FBI agents to operate without e-mail accounts, according to the agency's top official in New York." -- Source

Wasn't intelligence a serious issue with (the lack of) prevention for 9/11? So, wouldn't it be intelligent to support intelligence? And by support, I mean allow them to communicate more efficiently. Maybe we should invent some sort of agency that can help us with our intelligence....

Gitmo

2006-03-16T14:03:00.000-05:00

Check this article out.

Now, I realize you guys don't like polls. You made that quite evident a few days ago. But let me ask this:

Should the United States shut down Guantanamo Bay? I think they should. It is in my opinion that nothing of any substantive worth is taking place down there except the torture and imprisonment of individuals who are being denied basic human rights, up to and including the unalienable stuff our own nation was built on.

Now, the EU is stepping up to the plate, calling for Gitmo to be shut down as well. The U.N. has been very vocal in the past few months in their push for the prison's termination.

Whatcha got fo'ks?

Eric Said So

2006-03-15T00:30:00.000-05:00

Oscar night 2006 arrived during the season of Lent much to my chagrin. I am an overwhelmingly huge fan of the Stewart, Jon and, ever so slightly less, the Academy. I visited the vastly booming metropolis of Atlanta to visit the Mendenhall's for an evening and watched the Oscar's with them.

Kinda

I'm fasting television.

Instead, Bethany followed along on the computer. As the winner was announced, the site was updated, and the men (that's Eric and Me) were to postulate the winner, submitting an official selection the Misses of the Mendenhall's. Since I was a guest in their home, demanded fish, and refused to allow them the pleasure of watching the television...

I let Eric win.

I did! You can call me a liar, a fraud, a bullshitter of the highest order, but, alas, it is so. I know, Eric, it hurts. You thought you beat me. ME! He of the Greatest Ego! THE Cobra. Sorry, you did not. You were appeased.

Overall, 12 of my picks were good. I failed to give Memoirs of a Geisha their due respect and I paid for it. It didn't help when I tried to and John Williams got beat by gay cowboys (wtf). And you already know how I feel about pimps wit' dey "hoes on a tray." "Hoes" being a synonym for "Snow Bunny" which is a synonym for "White woman of ill repute."

Toothpaste for Dinner

2006-03-14T11:20:00.000-05:00

They've expanded. Check out Married to the Sea.

This Just In

2006-03-13T08:51:00.000-05:00

It's just a slap on the wrist...

Poll Question: Should we censure the president?

Slobodan

13 Days Later

And that Spring Break post is coming.

'Tis a Black Day

2006-03-09T20:08:00.000-05:00

Man it seems like I'm duckin dodgin bullets everyday
Niggaz hatin on me cause I got, hoes on the tray
But I gotta stay paid, gotta stay above water
Couldn't keep up with my hoes, that's when shit got harder
North Memphis where I'm from, I'm 7th Street bound
Where niggaz all the time end up lost and never found
Man these girls think we prove thangs, leave a big head
They come hopin every night, they don't end up bein dead
Wait I got a snow bunny, and a black girl too
You pay the right price and they'll both do you
That's the way the game goes, gotta keep it strictly pimpin
Gotta have my hustle tight, makin change off these women, yeah

--From Academy Award Winning song for Achievement in Music Written for Motion Pictures (Original Song) "It's Hard Out There for a Pimp" by Djay featuring Shug.
This song beat Dolly Parton and an amazing compilation from Crash. Their acceptance speech follows:

"Oh, my. Hey, we want to thank Keith Young our choreographer. And the whole Sony Records, Lisa Ellis, our moms, our whole families. Thank you, Jesus. And for giving us a chance, the Academy. We love the Academy. You know what I'm saying? Gil Cates. Everybody. I got plenty of time. Ain't nobody else. I want to thank everybody. Yeah. Donnie Ienner. Once again our families. Ludacris. What's up? Going down. George Clooney, my favorite man, he showed me love when I first met him. We bringing the house. We out of here. Memphis, Tennessee!"

I'm road-trippin' through Spring Break so, when I get back to the Creek I'll let everyone know how I fared in overall Oscar picks as well as an overall Spring Break-down. Hope everyone enjoyed watching Oscar Night because I certainly did. Possibly, the best Oscar Night ever....

TricycleBlog

2006-03-01T14:48:00.000-05:00

P.S. I found this Blog by happenstance and immediately found it worthy of my endorsement.

Who (k)News?

2006-03-01T12:24:00.000-05:00

She says: Fox News is the only truthful news program out right now. At least they give you both sides of the argument and have intelligent people arguing like Bill O'Reilly and Hannity and Colmes.

I respond: I am going to say this once and I want you to listen. Fox News needs to take their cock out of the Bush Administrations asshole.

So for all you Fox News advocates, this post's for you.

Zogby Poll States:
72% of American troops serving in Iraq think the U.S. should exit the country within the next year.
90% of Reserves favor withdrawal
83% of the National Guard favor withdrawal
70% of the Army favor withdrawal
58% of the Marines do, too
Almost 75% of National Guard and Reserve units favor withdrawal within 6 months.

42% of active troops are confused about their mission in Iraq
85% stated they were there “to retaliate for Saddam's roll in the 9-11 attacks”
77% said “to stop Saddam from protecting Al Qaeda in Iraq”

93% recognize they are not there to remove Weapons of Mass Destruction.
76% do not believe that the United States is establishing a democracy that can be a model for the Arab world.
11% accept the rationale that securing oil was a major purpose for going to war

Source

"We're making progress of dismantling al Qaeda. Slowly but surely we're bringing the people to justice and the world is better for it...It's not a matter of if they're captured and brought to justice, it's when they're brought to justice." George W. Bush

Bush's Approval rating has "stabilized" at an amazing 40%!

General William Odom, a Retired General, Former national security adviser to President's Carter and Reagan describes the Iraq War as “the most strategic foreign policy disaster in U.S. history.”

Brent Scowcroft, President George H.W. Bush's national security adviser argued in 2002 before the decision to invade Iraq that: “An attack on Iraq at this time would seriously jeopardize, if not destroy, the global counterterrorist campaign we have undertaken.”

Zbigniew Brzezinski, national security adviser to President Carter, describes President George W. Bush's foreign policy as “suicidal statecraft” and writes “Flailing away with a stick at a hornets' nest while loudly proclaiming 'I will stay the course' is an exercise in catastrophic leadership.”

Source
(This guy wants to be a Senator?)

Bush Visits the World's Largest Democracy. Hint: It wasn't America.

Great Pictures

And don't forget that while Dubyah is frolicking about the Middle East, Katrina is getting better...j/k j/k...

I have to go now, but MAN! did that feel good.

Life, Theatre, and the Future

2006-02-27T12:33:00.000-05:00

You ever think about the future? I mean, I know there are people who get payed alot of money to think about the future: Nostradamus, Ms. Cleo, and some old dead Bible dudes. But, what about us lay-people who are not equipped with the gift of premonition, an excellent marketing scheme, or divine possession? Are we seriously expected to just carry about our daily lives never knowing what is to happen to us next? I suppose so.

I just closed my last Campbell Universtiy Theatre production and it was pretty intense. We had a great closing night and for that I am deeply grateful. To the cast of Rumors, to the crew, to Dennis Johnson, to ARG!!, to Georgia, to Mrs. Ellis, to everyone that blessed me with their knowledge and wisdom of the stage whilst I was greener than I am today (that's Bethany, Eric, Rockel, Andie, LeTrent, Zach, Hayworth, Egm, Kelly Wolfe, Monday, and anyone else that is missing from the Old Regime), and anyone and everyone that has supported me and my plight to resist the dark side: THANK YOU FOR MAKING THEATRE MY HEROINE!!

Things aren't looking so hot for Tisch. I never fooled myself into believing that I was going to be accepted so the let down isn't as hard nor as far as it could have potentially been. But, it still sucks. I want to act. I guess I'm doomed to grind it out the way so many others before me have had to do as well. Oh well, I'm in good company. I truly feel that if I can keep up the relationships with the people I have from the World of Theatre that I will never be jonesin' for a fix for too long.

Well, now I'm going to go stare into my crytal ball really hard (I bought it on QVC, great deal) and see if I can't find out precisely what it is I should be doing and where it is I'll be going. If any of you have one that works, give it a shot on my behalf. If you send me an address, I'll even send you a locke of my hair if it'll help. I mean, something, anything, just a sign...

Musings

2006-02-22T13:04:00.000-05:00

Yesterday, I was in the Marshbanks. That is something I do. And, typically, whilst I am there, I am eating at a bar-like area (dry campus) pressed against a window watching the world go by. On occasion, I have been known to bring a bag of tea and today was one such occasion. After a meal of salad and fruit (melon makes you "last" longer), I commenced to sipping some Tazo Honeybush (for haiku about tea go here). Just as the four minute window of steeping time had closed, I removed the bag from the mug and began to draw a long, meditative breath of delight. It was a bit cloudy outside -- not the happiest of days as I recall. I raised the brew to my lips and wallowed in the deluctable first sip of a fresh cup of savory, moist leaf. Just as that captivatingly warm liquor plummeted down my throat and into my soul I noticed, for my gaze had not left the world outside the window, that the clouds were parting and a little ray of sunlight was passing betwixt them. No joke, people. Tea, indeed, makes the sun shine.

For those of you who were unawares, the Nemein has recently been converted to the realms of the Blogspot Bloggers. It's good to know that someone is doing their part to keep the balance of Blogger v. Xanga pitted in the right direction. Let him know if you have anything original worth noting.

My final show on the Campbell University stage is coming to a close this weekend. Bittersweet to say the least (that rhymes...). There was alot of negativity and even more worried speculation at the onset of Neil Simon's Rumors, but thanks to some hard work and strict determinacy in ousting all that negativity, ladies and gentlemen, we have a show. Ellis theatre has filled a giant space in my heart and I'm not sure what nor where I will find her replacement. Perhaps more on this later....

Finally, a bit on Love. I love Love. It's so cool. I spent all day Sunday cursing Valentine's day: "Well if we're not secretly getting married because Christian marriage is being persecuted, I don't know why I should celebrate." I say Sunday and not Tuesday because everyone who has a life probably had something to do on Tuesday, so every self-respecting girlfriend/wife made their man postpone the holiday to a more convenient date. However, at the end of the day on Sunday, after a dozen roses, some sappy, chocolate covered fortune cookies, chalk-flavored heart antacids that will never be consumed because they aren't vegetarian (nothing says "I love you" like Tums), some risque literature, a delicious blackened salmon dinner with spinach and black beans, a ten-year-old bottle of vino, and a two-volume "Happy Valentines Day!!" cd-collection comprised by your truly (Vol. I "Dinner," Vol. II "After Dinner"), I came to the striking revelation that V-Day isn't all that bad. Sure it's alot of work and a pain in the ass, but who doesn't like a little romance (if you're single and boo-hooing about being lonely on Valentines, just revel in the fact that you get to save a ton of time and money -- unless you're a girl, then, nobody likes you). So here's to Love. Go Love, you so rock.

I hope you've been a-mused.

P.S. I'm so punny!

I Cain't Vote So Guhd...

2006-02-18T18:22:00.000-05:00

Democracy for Dummies

Disenfranchising America

Calling All Blogspotters!!!

2006-02-16T18:17:00.000-05:00

This second post of the day is of extreme importance.

If you look to the sidebar you will notice that there has been a frigthening shift in the balance of endorsees. Xanga Bloggers now have one more blog endorsed by The Cobra then the Blogspotters, and that, is unacceptable.

So, start sending in your requests for endorsement immediately! And I don't mean like random blogs that never get updated. Being endorsed by The Cobra bears a great deal of responsibility and I will not stand by while people shirk around their blogging duties.

BLOGGSPOTTERS UNITE!!!!!!

Democracy via America

2006-02-16T15:20:00.000-05:00

See how well we set up elections in other countries here

And don't forget to check out Votergate to see how well we run our own elections

Rockel thinks this is "re-tah-did."

2006-02-14T23:50:00.000-05:00

“Ryan Lee Nazionale
presents:
a fairty tale of
Murder, Love and Betrayal
w/one super-hero”
by
Ryan Lee Nazionale

Set: Bare stage. actors use cubes.

lights up. man on stage in suit. he is narrator.

Narrator
Once upon a time...

Enter SABRINA. She frolics toward center stage. As she hits center,

Narrator
Somebody died.

SABRINA clutches throat, gets bug-eyed, and collapses. Enter SAMUEL, friend to SABRINA.

samuel
OH, VILLIANY! VILE TREACHORY! WHY!?!?

NARRATOR
The man’s cry echoed.

samuel
WHY?!?! WHY?! Why!? Why? why?

Narrator
Why, why, why, why, why: what brings us here tonight – a harrowing tale of love, murder, betrayal and fantasy. We will uncover the dark, mysterious answer to young Samuel’s wailing query. But first...flashback.

ACTORS rise and “rewind” off stage making flashback noises.

narrator
8 months ago...

SAMUEL & SABRINA enter with acting cubes for a bench.

samuel
Well, Sabrina, here we are.

sabrina
Yes, Sammy, we are...here.

samuel
Listen, Sabrina, I was wondering if, you know, maybe, if you thought that...that cloud looked like a bunny?

sabrina
Oh. Well, sure, I can see a bunny.

samuel
I’m glad. Heh. Well, look, Sabrina, do you think maybe that you know we might could...stand up and walk around. Not you. Me. Me stand walk. You, sit, stay.

sabrina
Samuel! I am a lady, not a dog. Now what is going on here?

SAMUEL stutters and stammers and makes a general fool of himself. NARRATOR reveals a magic wand, walks behind SAMUEL and waves it a few times.

samuel
(Quickly) Sabrina I think you’re a total babe and really smart and way super awesome will you be my girlfriend?

sabrina
Oh Sammy! Yes.

They frolic offstage.

narrator
AHEM!

SAMUEL & SABRINA re-enter scowling menacingly at NARRATOR and remove cubes.

narrator
Six months later...

Enter SAMUEL & SABRINA frolic to center stage.

samuel
Sabrina, I love you.

sabrina
Oh, Sammy-wammy, I wuv you too.

Exit SAMUEL & SABRINA

Narrator
Love. Young love. Beautiful ain’t it? And what’s more beautiful than love, hmm? American fast-food.

Enter LLOYD who creates a fast food counter. He works at Burger King. He stands behind counter, enter SAMUEL & SABRINA.

LLoyd
Take ‘er urder?

samuel
Yes, I’d like to order a double whopper combo and the lady would like a Big Fish combo.

lloyd
Dranks?

samuel
Two Cokes.

lloyd
Her ‘r g’tow?

samuel
G’tow.

LLOYD passes Burger King bag and drinks over counter to SAMUEL. SAMUEL & SABRINA exit.

lloyd
Oooohh. That Sammy. ‘E really gets muh gristle. ‘At Sab-a-rina is-uh ‘spose-uh be muh lade-uh. Well, if I’s-uh cain’t have ‘er, ‘en nuther cun ‘e. (sinister laugh)

Narrator
The next day...

Enter SAMUEL & SABRINA

lloyd
Take ‘er urder?

samuel
The usual, Lloyd. (pause) With pie.

lloyd
Dranks?

samuel
Two Cokes.

lloyd
(snickers) Her ‘er g’tow?

Samuel
G’tow.

LLOYD passes bag and cups over counter grinning maniacally.

narrator
Unbeknownst to Sabrina, Lloyd had slipped her a deadly Diet Coke with Nutrasweet (pianist strikes a minor chord). A lethal beverage containing Aspartame, a chemical agent containing the popular frog and fetus preserver Formaldehyde that doubles as a fatal poison which the body stores in fat cells in the hips and thighs. Diet, right? Aspartame is highly addictive and alters the chemical makeup of the brain, specifically, dopamine levels a chemical highly related to depression. Boo hoo. Patients coming off Aspartame not only experience heavy withdrawal symptoms but lose an average of 19 pounds! Diet, right? Pregnant women who consume Aspartame run a serious risk of birth defects.

ACTORS are staring at NARRATOR

narrator
Oh. Sorry. Where were we...where were we...AH! Yes! It was a hot day and Sabrina was thirsty.

SABRINA drinks, seizes up, and dies.

samuel
What? Sabrina? (kicks SABRINA, checks pulse) Oh no...NOOO!! Now I’m angry! (rips shirt revealing a “The Hulk” t-shirt) GRRRR!! SMASH! ANGRY!!

SAMUEL jumps, stomps, smashes, etc.

narrator
This behavior went on for a solid 30, 45 seconds at which point...

Samuel settles down, pulls out wallet and hands LLOYD money

samuel
Well, now that that’s all over, here ya go Lloyd. Man, I tell you what, talk about a mistake, I couldn’t get her to shutup like ever.

lloyd
Awl guhl’s tawk too much. ‘Ay shud keeps in a kitch’n uh-makin’ me samwhiches ‘n’ ruht buhrs.

SAMUEL & LLOYD exit with cubes

narrator
Betrayal! Eegads! Samuel set her up. But this story isn’t over yet.

NARRATOR reveals wand, walks to Sabrina’s body, waves wand about her and SABRINA sits up. NARRATOR whispers in her ear and hands her gun.

THE END.

Adult Swim

2006-02-09T16:30:00.000-05:00

Wanna see what all the fuss (and fire) is about?

Check out the Cartoons that could cause WW III.

P.S.

2006-02-08T22:27:00.000-05:00

If you want to be super-ultra witty and totally "with it," then you have to use the ultimate in witty comeback prefixes: P.S.

Now, "P.S." is shorthand for "Post Script." Which means it comes after something already written; in speech it means it comes after something already said.

For example:

Tom: Elron Hubbard totally kicks ass! P.S. Katie Holmes is a total babe.

--OR--

Mo: I talked to God and He said that you should all listen to me because I'm totally awesome. P.S. Kill all Jews.

--OR--

The Cobra: This Quiz Totally Kicks Ass. P.S. Rockel likes boys.

This infinitely amazing language application can be used in tandem with another individuals "P.S."

For Example:

The Cobra: This Quiz Totally Kicks Ass. P.S. Rockel likes boys.
Frank: P.S. that is so last week.
Bob: P.S. Rockel's so gay he tatooed a rainbow on his forehead.
The Cobra: P.S. Bob likes Rockel's rainbow.

In order to cement this totally rockin' literary phenomenon I will present you with this completely inappropriate and wholly malicious use of the "P.S."

Lloyd: P.S. I'm an auto-mechanic.

You see how that doesn't work?!?! He didn't say anything first to constitute the need for a postscript. This faux pas could have totally been avoided had this taken place:

Lloyd: Hi. P.S. I'm an auto-mechanic.

So, ladies and gentlemen, consider yourself enlightened in the ways of modern english. I'm sure this lesson has been informative and that you all payed very close attention because there will be a quiz later.

P.S. I can't believe how much I rule.

A Quiz that Totally Doesn't Suck

2006-02-06T23:24:00.000-05:00

True or False: This statement is False.

Sudoku

2006-02-03T00:08:00.000-05:00

Funny Sudoku story:

Recently, during rehearsal for "Rumours" by Neil Seimon, Amber passes me a page from her sudoku. I say,
"Sudoku is way gay. I can't believe what a loser you are."

I did the puzzle completely out of spite.

The next day, I'm at Inside-Out Sports next to Whole Foods Market on Wade Avenue in Raleigh. She's working and I'm waiting for her lunch break so we can go to the airport and I can go to New York.

She has recently purchased a sudoku book.

"I don't even know how to play." says she.

"I'll show you."

I do the first three puzzles.

She's wants to play.

"Fine."

She begins.

I wait.

"5 goes there."

"I know."

She squints real hard.

"Oh."

"Sudoku is so lame."

Time passes. It's time to go to the airport. We leave. Mushy-mushy, and I'm alone next to the
terminal waiting for my plane to arrive. I've already got a new high score on my cell phone application "Tetris," and I need something else to do. After reading a chapter of Jean-Paul Sartre's "Essays in Existentialism," I go exploring in RDU.

I find a Sudoku Puzzle book in a small, overpriced bookstore. Ironkically enough, it's composed by the same person as Tracie's.

The book is mine.

I'm on puzzle 24.

Groundhogese

2006-02-02T12:38:00.000-05:00

That being the official language of Punxsutawney Phil -- your favorite groundhog and mine.

Today, Punxsutawney Phil (P.P.) made his 119th State of the Union's Weather Address.

The result: six more depressing weeks of winter.

My spirits were high, but they were smashed down by that furry little rodent's supernatural sensory abilities in weather prediction. I'm considering having a nervous breakdown, going to intensive psychotherapy, and mailing P.P. my bills.

So, moving from P.P. to another, here are my favorite quotes from Dubyah's State of the Union Address:

"Tonight the state of our Union is strong -- and together we will make it stronger." -- Like he was gonna say "it's weak, and you morons are making it worse!"

"America rejects the false comfort of isolationism. We are the nation that saved liberty in Europe, and liberated death camps, and helped raise up democracies, and faced down an evil empire. Once again, we accept the call of history to deliver the oppressed and move this world toward peace." -- Look what I can do!

"Our offensive against terror involves more than military action. Ultimately, the only way to defeat the terrorists is to defeat their dark vision of hatred and fear by offering the hopeful alternative of political freedom and peaceful change." -- See, we fight terrorists with Hope. And hopefully we'll win; as long as Hope is on our side.

"And now the leaders of Hamas must recognize Israel, disarm, reject terrorism, and work for lasting peace. " -- Funny, I don't think those ideals are on the Hamas platform...

"We show compassion abroad because Americans believe in the God-given dignity and worth of a villager with HIV/AIDS, or an infant with malaria, or a refugee fleeing genocide, or a young girl sold into slavery." -- And we show it by making false promises to the people of Africa and protecting corrupt leaders in Haiti.

"The only alternative to American leadership is a dramatically more dangerous and anxious world." -- We are the Valium, the Paxil, and the Zoloft of the world.

"In the last two-and-a-half years, America has created 4.6 million new jobs -- more than Japan and the European Union combined." -- Did you know: In 2003, GM and Ford employed almost 700,000 people? That's over 15% of those "new jobs." So when they get laid off, they'll have somewhere else to go, right?

"Every year of my presidency, we've reduced the growth of non-security discretionary spending, and last year you passed bills that cut this spending. This year my budget will cut it again, and reduce or eliminate more than 140 programs that are performing poorly or not fulfilling essential priorities." -- This is the real cost of War. 140 programs that are not essential priorites because they are not "security" related. Here is an interesting article on how much some of these 140 programs cost. And not to mention that total federal spending has increased by 42%

"America is addicted to oil..." -- I'm yo' pushaaaaa!!!!

"We'll also fund additional research in cutting-edge methods of producing ethanol, not just from corn, but from wood chips and stalks, or switch grass." -- Switch Grass???? WTF?

"Tonight I announce an American Competitiveness Initiative, to encourage innovation throughout our economy, and to give our nation's children a firm grounding in math and science." -- 'Cuz today's youngsters cain't count so good.

"we must never give in to the belief that America is in decline" -- Deny everything.

"Tonight I ask you to pass legislation to prohibit the most egregious abuses of medical research: human cloning in all its forms, creating or implanting embryos for experiments, creating human-animal hybrids..." -- What about Mr. Tumnus? Can he stay?

"let us also work for the day when all Americans are protected by justice, equal in hope, and rich in opportunity." -- I'm sorry, but shouldn't we be rich in hope, and equal in opportunity...?

"We've entered a great ideological conflict we did nothing to invite. " -- I didn't do it, no one saw me do it, can't prove a thing!

"Before history is written down in books, it is written in courage. " -- See, before it's written, it's written, but on different stuff. It's written in soft and fluffy things like rhetoric.

"May God bless America." -- Or you can go to Hell.

This Blog Totally Rocks

2006-01-31T14:13:00.000-05:00

This one.

Join along on one young female's journey through the hustle and bustle of this thing we call life.

Might it also be said that Little Miss Nomad made a desperate appeal to my emotions which I was not prepared to endure. Let this be a warning to others: your pain is nothing to me. Jaime's words cut, healed, and scarred. Whatever semblance of a heart I had left has been hardened and immune to any attacks inflicted by you upon discovering the exclusion of your blog from my sidebar. If you wish your blog to receive my highly coveted endorsement you must appeal to a more objective, utilitarian, humorous, or insightful realm of my consciousness.

In other news:

I love fish.

It took me becoming a vegetarian to even consider the wide world of fish.

I guess that doesn't make me a vegetarian. A "vegequarian" would be a more accurate term.

I like red snapper, sea bass, salmon, tilapia, mahi mahi, and swordfish.

I do not like catfish. They eat shit.

Progress

2006-01-29T13:48:00.000-05:00

It's a good thing.

As you may or may not have noticed, I have revamped ye old Ego.

If you feel that your blog is worthy of my endorsement and find its absence disconcerting, you may submit to me a short essay (less than 100 words) explaining why your blog should be included in my list.

There are also some fun little links I would recommend. Check back on those. They might be changed and updated or deleted.

enjoy

It's all so clear now...

2006-01-24T23:54:00.000-05:00

You scored as Anarchism. <'Imunimaginative's Deviantart Page'>

Anarchism

100%

Green

92%

Democrat

42%

Socialist

33%

Communism

25%

Republican

25%

Nazi

Fascism

What Political Party Do Your Beliefs Put You In?
created with QuizFarm.com

I've been so curious for so long on just how I could pigeon-hole myself. Thank you QuizFarm.com for showing me precisely where I belong on the political spectrum with your bubble-in E-queries. I wonder how many people say they love the teachings of Benito Mussolini. How many people recognize the name, know his teachings, or still believe in Fascism. I would argue that the only remaining fascists in America are too ignorant to realize that Il Duce invented da damn thang.

Holler.

"If you're a fan of hardcore country music this is one for you."

2006-01-19T10:50:00.000-05:00

Monty and the Pythons

Sue these people.

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not big on the Copyright Act of 1972, but throw me a freakin' bone here! This is blatant infringement upon the rights of the greatest comedy troupe of all time THE Monty Python.

Proof of this is evident if any of you iTunes subscribers care to do a search for "Monty Python." Right there with the other 10+ albums by the real guys is this utterly fraudulent composition by a group of individuals blatantly seeking exposure by riding on the coattails of geniusi. And if I know the Pythons (and I do) they would never let anyone ride on their coattails....especially some honky tonk, two-steppin', country-bubba from Nashville!

So, I am calling for a boycott of Monty and the Pythons. That includes any an all songs written by Monty Holmes. So if anyone who peruses this blog suffers through similar ear-hemorrhaging noise such as George Strait and LeAnne Womack...CEASE AND DESIST!! Change the radio station with all deliberate speed! Avoid CMT! And, most importantly, That Nasheville Network!

Only when these so called "pythons" (note the lower case) change their name, recall all their albums, submit a public apology to the real Pythons (and to me!), and admit that country music totally sucks balls will I entertain the idea of repealing my boycott. And not a second earlier!

We must protect the pockets of the Pythons! It's what they would want.

Give My Regards...

2006-01-18T01:21:00.000-05:00

Give them here.

But I do not need you to give mine for I will surely give yours, this weekend in fact. No, you read correctly. To clarify:

I'M GOING TO NEW YORK!!!!!! (bitches)

The reason? An audition at the Tisch School for the Arts at the New York University.

To give you an idea of what eactly I'm in for, there are three weekends of auditions in New York, one weekend in Chicago, and another in Los Angeles -- each filled with three days of young aspiring talent. Fifty of these fantastic dreamers get called back in March and 18 get invited to join the program.

So...yea...and stuff...I'm going for the big time. Audition on Broadway Avenue. Crossin' my fingers and sayin' a little prayer so "tell all the gang at 42nd street I'll soon be there."

Numbers Don't Lie

2006-01-03T22:17:00.000-05:00

[insert bitter comment denouncing the "accurracy" of polls]

Auld Lang Syne

2005-12-31T10:04:00.000-05:00

Translates to "the times gone past; the good old days."

So here we are wishing a fond farewell to good old days gone by and I, for one, look back with contentment and cheer on this past year. 2005 brought us such amazing endeavors as

--Skateboards
--Daego's Sober Semester
--Happy 22nd B-Day
--Tracie
--The Death of the Daego and the subsequent
--Birth of The Cobra
--The Taming of the Shrew
--Welcoming back lost family
--Poetry, which I know you all love...

Hopefully, 2006 will be as exciting. New Year's resolutions include:

--Getting in the gym ("BEEFCAAAAKE!!")
--Turning habit into recreation
--Being a better lover (I recommend this to all of you)

Happy New Year everybody!! And don't go too crazy on the Willie-Waught!!

"And here's a hand my trusty friend,
And put your hand in mine.
We'll take a right good willie-waught [Drink],
For old lang syne.

And surely you'll lift up your glass,
For surely I'll lift mine,
And we'll drink a cup of kindness yet,
For old lang syne."

Lines

2005-12-06T14:15:00.000-05:00

The one that separates you from me.
The one between bondage and free.
The one between love and loss.
The one between price and cost.

The fine truth of perception.
The selectively deceptive.
The moment between is and was.
Beginning to loathe that which you love.

What is compromise if not surrender?
A heart of stone if not too tender?
Sunlight if not blinding white?
Hope if not out of sight?